411 Comments
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Rene's avatar

Why doesn’t someone establish a program that is not part of the school system to teach the fundamentals and the things the school won’t teach- maybe education at a hospital, doctors office or community center? Since there are no funds that have to be contended with- what could stop outside programs

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Joe Schmoe, Troublemaker's avatar

Florida, the state where reality goes to die, silently and without witness. SM(MF-ing)H

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Zyxomma's avatar

Ta, Marcie. Flashing back to eighth grade, when the "health" teacher (who was really a gym teacher) could not draw a penis to save her life. We all laughed and laughed.

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Anzu's avatar

I had mediocre sex ed from Georgia school systems, but there was at least actual sex it. I remember the "health science" teacher (a wrestling coach) breaking the script and begging the kids in our freshman class to "use a damn condom, it's not hard, and it prevents SO MANY problems." He was a good guy.

I got comprehensive, full blown, "let's watch a cartoon of sperm in tuxedos courting the egg in a poofy ball gown" sex ed during Girl Scouts, along with dire warnings about teen pregnancy, STDs, and even a bit of a precautionary tale that even the well meaning menfolk in our lives may try to play on our emotions and use sex to hurt us. That we didn't "owe" it to anyone - that it was a gift to be freely given of our own volition. Someday. When we were way way older.

I can't speak for the other girls in my junior troop, but I was a virgin until my early 20s, because hoo boy some of the STD pictures were scary as fuck.

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Runfastandwin's avatar

The best way to get kids to do something is tell them they can't. Which means more unprotected sex, more stds, more teen pregnancy, etc etc etc. Jeebus these people are STUPID.

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simpledinosaur's avatar

Well, no doubt we must all beware of the "international communist conspiracy to sap and impurify all of our precious bodily fluids." (Gen. Jack D. Ripper, in Dr. Strangelove)

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Runfastandwin's avatar

I do not avoid women but I do deny them my essence.

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simpledinosaur's avatar

Very prudent.

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Biff52 Lost Canadian's avatar

I guess P.J. O'Rourke wasn't available, so they got Dr. Ladapo instead?

http://andeverythingelsetoo.blogspot.com/2014/08/sex-education-class.html

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Dina's avatar

Yeah, poor ol' P.J. died a couple years ago...I used to subscribe to NL for years, he was great!

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Mike_Cramer's avatar

Oh, I hadn’t heard that.

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Dina's avatar

Yeah, I remember when he died, I had a big sad.

According to Wikipedia: "In September 2008, O'Rourke announced that he had been diagnosed with treatable rectal cancer, from which he expected "a 95% chance of survival". O'Rourke died from lung cancer at his home in Sharon, New Hampshire, on February 15, 2022, at the age of 74."

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Darth Trad's avatar

That all sounds pretty 'woke'.

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Fiddlesticks's avatar

The kids deserve better!

I want to blanket every florida school with flyers printed with links to scarleteen. . . .

Because those kids all have the internet and have seen porn already at a young age. What is the education department protecting them from?

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Craig Nixon's avatar

Your pals, and mine, Moms For Liberty, strongly oppose teaching about consent at any curriculum level.

What's that you say? Who in their right mind would be against teaching the concept of consent? (yes, "right mind" is doing some heavy lifting here).

Well, we asked Tiffany Justice 𝑤ℎ𝑦 the hell they would oppose teaching about consent. Moms For Liberty's answer? <gird your loins, by all means> Consent is <actual quote here> "a slippery slope toward pedophilia."

You may now remove your heads from your desks. We hope no-one was too badly injured.

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Peter MacMonagle's avatar

We are now in the age of Helicopter Parents meet the Nanny State: "God forbid my child be exposed to anything upsetting or even vaguely unsettling." This is why children reject their parents' world when they wake up to the lies their parents forced upon them as children. I am so glad and grateful my parents did not tightly manage my reading growing up.

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Jim Parker's avatar

So "fluid" is a big no-no. What about "moist"? Good or bad to the great protectors of children and all the repressed mommies in Flori-duh.

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Craig Nixon's avatar

How about "viscous ooze"? Is nothing sacred??

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GreyLadyBast's avatar

Mucus. It's all mucus membranes anyway.

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Dialectic.Detective's avatar

All they are allowed to talk about is the magic stork and baby Jesus!

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Wookiee Monster's avatar

The “verbal feedback” thing is something I had never heard of during my time as a state bureaucrat. Nothing counted unless it was in writing. Is it because even they know this is all holy fuckballs stupid and no one in the state department of education wants their names attached to this shit?

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Wookiee Monster's avatar

Fluids? You can’t talk about fluids in school? That’s going to make teaching the hydrologic cycle and why Florida is so prone to flooding difficult.

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Jim Parker's avatar

That would likely come lead to the topics of climate change and environmental crisis, both of which are fake news and big hoaxes in America's limp dick state. So nope, no can do.

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Wookiee Monster's avatar

It would be hard for anyone in Florida to claim floods are fake news.

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Jim Parker's avatar

Oh, give those MAGA folks a chance to claim floods are fake news, and some credit for their immense stupidity. They will stand in hip deep water and claim it's just a king tide. BTW, you can't say "hard" in Floriduh, either. Don't give their precious little flowers any ideas.

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northern point's avatar

oo! oo! we can use "flaccid' and collect pronunciations!

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Craig Nixon's avatar

In their perfect world, every inch of the planet is as dry as Ben Shapiro's wife.

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House of the Blue Lights's avatar

I don't even want to think about the hangups these people must have. wtaf.

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