320 Comments
User's avatar
NorthStarSpanx's avatar

The slo-mo industry needs a vehicle.

5G Krieger is 5G's avatar

Card-carrying nerd here; yes, he is a dweeb. You can smell it from a mile off.

5G Krieger is 5G's avatar

Carson. We need more diversity on the ticket, and nothing's better than an anthropomorphic ground sloth who's also black.

Msgr MΩment classic ☑️'s avatar

Cocksucker libel! (somebody had to)

calliecallie's avatar

Was it a sort of military softcore porn, and Major Ivy was the dominatrix?

Takoma DC's avatar

So Ted Cruz more capable than the FBI? If you believe that then you're mucho mas delusional.

Jenny, a lowly Piñata Farmer🪅's avatar

"Best political ad of all time!!!"

That's a really low bar to hop over.

/yawn

Jenny, a lowly Piñata Farmer🪅's avatar

Of course not. That would require more than watching a witty movie!

Apple Scruff's avatar

It kills me that Cruz is technically Gen X.

Takoma DC's avatar

No U.S. firm would work for him.

Jenibrio Jenificus's avatar

He is technically an alien (as in, extra terrestrial) lizard man, so I do not think Genx has to apologize for this one.

RobKanC's avatar

Too far buddy. Too far.

Wookie Monster's avatar

I can also see Cruz upbraiding some hapless staffer. "Five pieces of flair is the minimum number."

Wookie Monster's avatar

Ted, if you could stop ruining our best cultural references, that would be great.

doktorzoom's avatar

OK, so it looks like there will be content for "Dear Shit Fer Brains" Sunday after all. Thanks! Also, banhammered with great pleasure.