Wonkette

Share this post

Former Iraq Ambassador Ryan Crocker Arrested For DUI, Hit-And-Run

www.wonkette.com

Discover more from Wonkette

Wonkette is filthy, hilarious, liberal news. YOU CAN HANDLE THE TRUTH!
Over 18,000 subscribers
Continue reading
Sign in

Former Iraq Ambassador Ryan Crocker Arrested For DUI, Hit-And-Run

Jim Newell
Aug 23, 2012
Share this post

Former Iraq Ambassador Ryan Crocker Arrested For DUI, Hit-And-Run

www.wonkette.com
9
Share

They say that astronauts become alcoholics after returning from space, because they were in space, which was better. This is perfectly analogous to the situation of former U.S. Ambassador Ryan Crocker -- the man who SAVED IRAQ along with Gen. Petraeus and then... [somethinged] Afghanistan with Gen. Petraeus -- who returned from seeing constant murder everywhere in the Middle East and now just drives his car into other cars while drunk and then speeds away. (Allegedly.) Fortunately no one was hurt, but Crocker was hella arrested and will now die in jail, maybe. (He won't).

First Fox News reveals the name of a war hero, and now the so-called "police of Washington state" arrest a decorated State Department diplo-talky servant for a lil' drunken nick of another car. Must all of our war people suffer such indignation?

SPOKANE, Wash. -Ambassador Ryan Crocker, one of the most decorated State Department diplomats in the last half century, was arrested on August 14 by the Washington State Patrol for hit-and-run and DUI in Spokane Valley.

A Spokane native, Crocker, 63, was arrested at the intersection of Sprague Ave. and Pines Road at 2: 05 p.m. on August 14 by a WSP trooper. According to the State Patrol, Crocker was in the left turn lane on Pines turning onto Stprague when he tried to turn right from the left turn lane, crossing two lanes of traffic and clipped a semi, damaging the passenger side of the 2009 Ford Mustang he was driving.

Oh whatever, he was probably right around the legal limit, which means nothing.

Crocker was pulled over, received a field sobriety test from a WSP trooper and had a .16 BAC on one test, which is twice the legal limit in Washington State. Another test indicated a .152 BAC.

Okay, he was drunk as shit.

[ KXLY ]

Want to just donate once?

Share this post

Former Iraq Ambassador Ryan Crocker Arrested For DUI, Hit-And-Run

www.wonkette.com
9
Share
Previous
Next
9 Comments
Share this discussion

Former Iraq Ambassador Ryan Crocker Arrested For DUI, Hit-And-Run

www.wonkette.com
fuflans
Aug 15

ummm i think you're thinking that one fun invadin' president and possibly that one vampire vp?

dude was a career diplomat. i got no beef with that. we need civil service.

Expand full comment
Reply
Share
fuflans
Aug 15

yeah thanks for that. this story made me sad.

Expand full comment
Reply
Share
7 more comments...
Top
New
Community

No posts

Ready for more?

© 2023 Commie Girl Industries Inc.
Privacy ∙ Terms ∙ Collection notice
Start WritingGet the app
Substack is the home for great writing