Discover more from Wonkette
Fox News Pretty Sure Tyrant Biden Bringing Back Mask Mandates, Maybe Even Putting Mask On Your Face RIGHT NOW
This is just pathetic.
Last week, the Fox News website ran an article with the ominous headline, "Mask mandate return? HHS report wants to ‘encourage or mandate’ masking to stop long COVID.” In a rarity for Fox, the basis of the story is rooted in reality. The Department of Health and Human Services (HHS) commissioned a report, produced by independent research agency Coforma, that offered a variety of recommendations for helping people with long COVID. Reinstating the mask mandate was just one of them, but it’s freaking out people who would’ve just ignored the mandate anyway.
The report suggested policymakers “encourage or mandate policies and protocols regarding masking and social distancing in public spaces that protect people from infection or reinfection and possible long COVID.” However, an HHS department spokesperson told the New York Post that a mask mandate "is NOT a recommendation HHS made.” (Note the all-caps emphasis.) “All the recommendations included in the report were derived from the research participants ([people with] Long COVID, their caregivers, health care providers, advocates, and other subject-matter experts.)”
Nonetheless, the Post ’s headline still reads "HHS-authorized report recommends masks, distancing for ‘long COVID’.”
Fox News quickly seized on the report as proof that President Joe Biden lied when he declared the pandemic “over” in September. During a "60 Minutes" interview, Biden said, "We still have a problem with COVID. We're still doing a lot of work on it. But the pandemic is over. If you notice, no one's wearing masks. Everybody seems to be in pretty good shape. And so I think it's changing.” That’s probably too complex a statement for Fox News, which wants to spin this as Biden’s “Read my lips: No new pandemics” moment.
On “Outnumbered,” panelist Carley Shimkus ranted about a Texas study that recommended children wear masks to prevent the flu. “Where does it end?” Shimkus cried. Uh ... when kids aren’t needlessly contracting the flu? Maybe Shimkus had a different experience with childhood illnesses, but the flu ain't a trip to Disney World.
“What is this about?” the incredibly stupid person wondered. “Is this risk aversion? Fear? A control tactic?”
People in Asian countries have worn masks during flu season for years. This is not some new woke conspiracy. It’s a common sense public health measure we could’ve all adopted after the pandemic if not for rightwing morons who made masks a political issue.
Donald Trump’s former White House press secretary and congenital liar Kayleigh McEnany insisted that masks are “abusive to our children.” (My son would rather wear a mask than shoes most days.) McEnany said, “One of my daughter’s first words was ‘mask,’ and that’s so sad.” It is sad that McEnany would involve her own child in this shameless (likely) lie. However, we’re fair and balanced at Wonkette, so we concede it’s possible her daughter’s first word was a simple recognition of the world around her. That’s standard childhood development, not psychological trauma.
The HHS report said the "lifting of mask mandates and indifferent attitude toward masking and social distancing typical in many public and private places further isolates people with Long COVID." That really pissed off the “Outnumbered” gang, who couldn’t understand why they had to care about other people. According to panelist and "libertarian columnist” Kat Timpf, the whole long COVID thing is “confusing" and the government should just leave everyone alone.
Of course, the Biden administration isn’t bringing back mask mandates, but McEnany cynically suggested there’s no reason to “believe” what the administration says. This conveniently allows Fox News to rail against an entirely imaginary mask mandate. It’s the new migrant caravan.
This all climaxed Monday when Fox announced “breaking news” that Democrats “in one area” are bringing back masking. Just watch Harris Faulkner’s Shatner-esque delivery of the words “just short of a mandate.”
“Breaking News from Fox. Some people somewhere are wearing masks”
— Acyn (@Acyn) 1669651466
Los Angeles county is “strongly recommending” people wear masks indoors in preparation for a winter surge, not just in COVID-19 but other viral illnesses. (That’s literally in the chyron below Faulkner!) This isn't a mandate. It’s barely a positive Yelp review. But Fox News won’t stop feeding its viewers' pandemic persecution complex.
Follow Stephen Robinson on Twitter if it still exists.
Subscribe to the Wonkette YouTube Channel for nifty video content!
Look at our pretty photos on Instagram!
Yr Wonkette is 100 percent ad-free! Please subscribe, donate, and otherwise help keep us alive and kicking!