Freedom-Hating Boston Mayor Asks People Not To Dive Off Buildings, Please

Not that we need any more evidence that the nanny state is totally out of control, but this week, Boston Mayor Martin Walsh proved it yet again, with his freedom-killing press conference. Apparently, what with the HUGE blizzard covering the entire city of Boston in snow -- which proves global warming is a dumb liberal hoax -- some patriots have decided it would be wicked fun to jump out of buildings and into all that snow, because what could possibly go wrong? But oh no, the mayor, who obviously hates fun and freedom, has asked people not to do that, what a jerk:

“We’re asking people to act responsibly in the city of Boston,” Walsh said. “This isn’t Loon Mountain, this is the city of Boston, where we’re trying to remove snow off of the street and it becomes very dangerous. And the last thing we want to do is respond to an emergency call where somebody jumped out of the window because they thought it was a funny thing to do.”

Walsh is unreasonably and irrationally concerned that people could injure themselves jumping off buildings into the street, which seems awfully paranoid and helicopter dad of him, but at least one quack doctor in America agrees with him that yeah, that could be a bad idea:

"It can certainly be life-threatening," Dr. Tom Nowicki, an emergency physician in Hartford, Connecticut, told WFSB. "It would be very unfortunate to break your neck and lose function of your arms and legs from something that was intended to be fun."

Nowicki explained that many snowbanks are hiding patches of ice or objects that could cause physical harm. "There could be anything underneath that's covered by the snow," he said.

However, thanks to conservatives, we know that these kinds of unnecessary warnings are just Big Government's way of trying to control us. Let us not forget, as Rush Limbaugh taught us in January, that the big blizzard New York braced for in January wasn't so bad after all (in New York; however, see above re, ahem, Boston), so all those warnings from the city's "idiot mayor" about being "prepared" and "taking safety precautions" were a waste of everyone's time and further evidence, as Rush said, that "the left has corrupted everything," including the National Weather Service.

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Fox News was also outraged -- OUTRAGED!!! -- that the East Coast was oppressed with warnings about weather because it meant "we had to give up our freedom and sit in our house, no cars on the road." Because all those scientists were so wrong about New York getting totally wiped out, this just goes to show that scientists can't be trusted and really, aren't we all better off taking our chances without any warnings about potentially catastrophic weather, because otherwise that's the end of freedom? And driving?

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But of course that isn't stopping Boston's mayor from trying to destroy democracy by asking people not to do dumb stuff like this:

Naturally, the mayor's admonition has only made residents want to be even more dumber.

“I haven’t had contact with the outside world in days," said [Boston resident Christina ] Phaup, who was snowed in at her apartment over the long weekend. Now that Walsh gave her the idea, though, “I’m putting that on my to-do list.”

Hahaha, that'll really show the mayor, won't it? Because nothing says freedom like a broken neck.

[ Boston Herald via HuffPo ]