Georgia O'Keeffe's Pudding Cake! Tabs, Mon., Aug. 4, 2025

Morning news roundup! Things to read!

Tabs gif by Martini Glambassador

Tumble out of bed and stumble to the kitchen, Wonksters, it’s Monday morning tabs! What’s been going on?

A typo-studded memo authored by Pete Hegseth’s little brother Phil got leaked to The New Republic, showing staff from DHS met with the Hegseth boys and officials at the Department of Defense, to discuss Dear Leader sending the military to invade more American cities. (The New Republic)

Speaking of *HIC* hires from Fox News, the Senate has confirmed former host Jeanine Pirro as the US Attorney for the District of Columbia. (CBS)

The Corporation for Public Broadcasting announced Friday that it was shutting down; it provides 70 percent of funding to local 330 PBS and 246 NPR stations across the country, and at least 80 stations in the smallest markets are expected to close. So, that is awful. (NBC)

The DOJ is trying to get voter data from every single state. Trump gonna fix it so you’ll never have to vote again! (Democracy Docket)

You knew this was coming: Office of the Special Counsel, currently headed by (acting) man-of-many jobs Jamieson Greer, has opened a Hatch Act investigation into former Special Counsel Jack Smith, because he investigated sweet innocent lamb Donald Trump like he was appointed to do. (ABC)

Trump called himself the “father of IVF” and the “fertilization president,” but turns out daddy’s a deadbeat! His promise to cover IVF has gone nowhere, and DOGE layoffs have gutted maternal health and reproductive medicine programs. Trump voters, ya got tricked again! (CBS)

Utah has decided that their laws have been too harsh on poor misunderstood young-adult sex offenders, conveniently right in time for an 18-year old relative of Utah senate President J. Stuart Adams to avoid prison for raping a 13-year-old. Huh. (Salt Lake Tribune)

Kash Patel’s 26-year-old girlfriend gets why some people think she’s a spy for Mossad, but she wants everyone to know she loves the 45-year-old for his amazing personality. (Daily Beast archive link)

Ted Cruz ought to worry about women in Texas dying of sepsis, but instead he’s beating his keyboard about New York governor Kathy Hochul covering her head at the funeral for murdered Muslim police officer Didarul Islam. (New York Times archive link)

Also in Texas-

Donald Trump Junior is getting body-shamed online for his perky daddy milkers. (Irish Star)

Epstein is clearly still a very sensitive subject for Donald Trump the older; he was triggered into one of his epic online rants at 1:49 AM Sunday after radio host Charlamagne Tha God went on Lara Trump’s Fox News program and said that the Epstein Files are causing a “coup” of traditional Republicans. (New York Times archive link)

After moaning about her genes in an American Eagle ad for (Chinese-made) blue jeans — a subject Fox News covered 28 times more than the Epstein files — Florida woman Sydney Sweeney has been revealed to be a registered Republican. Was she Mike White’s inspiration for that White Lotus scene? (The Independent / The Guardian)

Quality long reads:

Nick Ripatrazone on how Marshall McLuhan predicted Peter Thiel. (Slate)

Jessica Klein with the inside story of Eric Trump’s investment in American Bitcoin mining. (Wired)

E. Tammy Kim’s got a grim report from federal institutions in disarray. (New Yorker archive link)

Eesh, how about some happier things?!

Yale library has Georgia O’Keefe’s recipe cards, and the lemon cake pudding on image 410 is a classic that makes an amazing confection that is half cake, half pudding. Definitely try! (Yale archives)

The Hollywood Bowl has been hosting a revival of “Jesus Christ Superstar” with Adam Lambert as Judas, Josh Gad as Herod and Cynthia Erivo as Jesus, which has been bringing down the house. The usual people are real mad about it! (EW)

WONKMEET in CLEVELAND with Rebecca, Shy, and Cleveland’s newest resident, Ziggy Wiggy! Aug. 16, 1 p.m. at the Boss Dog Brewing Company, 2179 Lee Rd., Cleveland Heights, OH 44118. Rebecca is buying!

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