GET UP IDIOTS IT'S TIME FOR A ELECTION
HEY! IT'S TIME! GET UP GET UP GET UP GET UP!
Oh look it is the alarm clock on our extremely fragile democracy and after three years of hitting the snooze button it is time to LEAP OUT OF BED and GET YOUR ASS TO ... well, the couch is a good first step. We can try "outside" after we've been sitting upright a while.
That's right the election is a year from yesterday, or that is what the internet has told me and I THINK that was today but who even knows, time is melted. That fucker broke time.
Look, we never thought it would be this bad. And when some of you had your hair on fire before the election three years ago, we (me) were (was) like, "Oh, he's stupid and evil and it's gonna be bad but it's not gonna be the END OF DEMOCRACY, gah you're all such DRAMA QUEENS."
We (I) were (was) really, truly, unspeakably wrong. He is everything the most hysterical among you imagined, and more. And now I hope you all are over your you time and your mental health break, because the marathon is over and now we've got a yearlong sprint.
What do we do? We talk to our neighbors, especially but not only the ones who suck. We use honey, not vinegar, which is a hilarious thing for your Wonkette to say, because we are bitches, but in person it's true. We read every thing we can possibly can, so that next time the hot appliance repair man comes over (bow chicka bow wow!), we can explain why Jordan Peterson saying "white men are like this and women and black dudes are just different" is actually bad. (We are no longer looking forward to the hot appliance repair man's next visit, Trump ruins EVERYTHING!) We pay attention; we bear witness; we put on our bumper stickers especially in a red state so that people in the parking lot have someone to tell: "I thought I was the only one." Take their fucking number, and call them, and keep at it. (Don't call so much it's annoying. And never call a person under 30, I hear.)
I'm basically a one-issue voter lately (two after MY VAGINA), and it's "who is being bitches to other Democrats and who is being lovey hippie lovers and is saying nice things and may stay." Am I mad at some of them? YES, PETE, because you're being a BITCHES. Do I give a goddamn fuck about hearing MORE about their health care plans? Fucking STOP IT. Y'all Bernie people KNOW the only reason you're insisting on ONLY THIS VERSION of Medicare 4 All is to weed out anyone who's not Bernie including Elizabeth Warren who's cosponsored it but like not hard enough. And Amy Klobs and Biden and Pete people bitching about Medicare 4 All, you KNOW you're only trying to kneecap the lefties with your hippie-punching and "but peeeeeeople love their insuuuuuurance" shut the fuck up y'all LIARS. I actually heard Terry McAuliffe say yesterday on the teevee, because my dad and his six broken ribs have colonized the living room and the news is ALWAYS FUCKING ON, that the Democrats need to stop talking about Trump so they can talk more about health care. Unless what Terry McAuliffe is saying Democrats should be saying is "Obamacare was a terrific first step that Trump then sabotaged and I will sign ANY BILL to improve it," then Terry McAuliffe needs to ZIP IT!
Regardless, now is when we get back in it, if we ever left. Be informed, and be loud. Peggy Noonan might be (just kidding she is) full of shit, but she's right about the fucking yard signs. People want excitement, and they want to belong. Give them something to belong to, and you, you belong right here, in our bosoms. You belong with us .
Oh, and call your state Dem party and get started on the Senate. Since I PERSONALLY got Jon Tester reelected in Montana, fuck you yes I did, let's see you do the same in North Carolina and Maine and Nebraska (I forget?) and AZ.
RISE AND SHINE WONKERS. IT'S FUCKIN' TIME.
Teletubbies: Wake Up - Full Episode www.youtube.com
What's that Tinky Winky? It's OPEN THREAD!
Oh, thank you so much. It's really lovely of you to remember and to say this. He was such a lively little dude, a very vivid personality with a lot of funny quirks and behaviors, so it's a big loss and so many things trigger his memory.
Another story: we have a printer hidden behind the couch in the living room, networked to all the various laptops in the house (I work at home, we have another laptop in the den, etc etc). Whenever the printer would turn on and start clicking, Buddy would RACE from wherever he was in the house and leap on the printer to "help," usually turning it off in the process.
So whenever we'd go into the living room to collect whatever we'd printed, we'd say to each other "Was it you who turned off the printer so my file wouldn't print out?" or "The printer got turned off, how on earth could that have happened I wonder!"
So the other night, Mr. Cat Cafe and I were in the den and he hit print to print something out... and we both started sobbing. What a goofy silly boy Buddy was.
As I said, we're doing a bit better this week, not so much outright sobbing, but we're still very heavyhearted. Again, thanks for asking and being so kind.
I replied to you twice, GMTA, though, and I live in Florida.