Giuliani to Tackle Spending, Sodomize it With a Billy Club
While 9/11 all day, every day has been working pretty well thus far, Rudy still needs asecondvaguely conservative principle if he's going to run for president as a Republican. So tomorrow he will announce his new campaign against spending, the handiest way to prove your conservative bona fides while still killing babies and divorcing gays.
Battling to hold conservative support, former New York City Mayor Rudy Giuliani Wednesday will open a new offensive on economic policy. In an interview, Giuliani said he will offer an initial roadmap for reversing Washington's "culture of spending" at a speech in Des Moines, Iowa.
If president, Giuliani promises to detain and torture spending until it reveals where it plans to strike next.