Glenn Greenwald Misses His Friend Tucker, Glenn Loves His Friend, YOU DON'T KNOW HIM LIKE GLENN KNOWS HIM!

Glenn is going through a thing.

When funny things like the down and dirty sudden firing of Tucker Carlson happen, it's easy to forget about all the other people it will affect. The janitors, the producers, the team of Junior KKK College Fluffers who are just there for an internship, allegedly. Tucker's wife, whoever she is, Susan, we think, who will presumably have to see him on more days now. Thoughts and bless your hearts for her.

And then there are the other casualties, the abject freaks and clowns and dregs of society who wouldn't have hardly anything to do if Tucker didn't invite them on his show all the time, so they could sit in the Testicle-Tanner-Built-For-Two and talk about the issues of the day. Who is sending them a care package today?

“Tucker Carlson guests like Glenn Greenwald, Gays Against Groomers, and Andy Ngo are melting down about his exit because it threatens to push them further into the margins. Carlson and his producers gave a lot of airtime to cranks and they lost today too.”

— Michael Edison Hayden (@Michael Edison Hayden) 1682370002 

 Hayden wrote about a few of Tucker's cranks in his newsletter today. We should also mention Douglas MacGregor, one of Tucker's favorite Russian propaganda dispensers, whom Tucker brought on when he wanted to give his viewers Russian propaganda with a thin patina of "this guy's a retired Army guy!" on top, which we guess convinced his viewers, because they were/are stupid.

But this post is about the first guy Hayden listed there, Tucker's greatest propaganda dispenser of all, an idiot who loved Tucker and the access Tucker gave him so very much, a man who has been absolutely inconsolable since yesterday: Glenn Greenwald.

When we say "inconsolable since yesterday," we need you to know that we mean he is literally still blubbering on Twitter even today, right this second as we type this. He's blubbering in Portuguese. 

“Que Tucker enfureceu um grande parte do público da Fox, dizendo que o advogado de Tump não apresentou evidências de fraude eleitoral é bem conhecido. Mas os brasileiros ouvem a Globo e o Estadão repetindo o que a CNN diz, então acredite no contrário: https://t.co/uYK7u56vqK”

— Glenn Greenwald (@Glenn Greenwald) 1682430201 

But let's go back to the beginning when the news broke.

 Glenn's first statement was to make fun of Brian Stelter for thinking Tucker would talk to him. SCOFF, Glenn knows who talks to Tucker, and YOU SIR are no TUCKER TALKER TO-ER!

 Glenn's second statement was about Don Lemon.

But then it was time to go to bat for his white supremacist fascist American boyfriend Tucker, because would you believe people were making fun of Tucker's demise and Don Lemon's demise in the same breath?

“There is no comparing these two stories. One was the most-watched cable news host in the history of the medium. The other was someone who - despite having one of the most powerful corporate brands promoting him - couldn't get anyone watching him or interested in what he says.”

— Glenn Greenwald (@Glenn Greenwald) 1682360799 

 And then Glenn explained why the libs REALLY hate Tucker, and it is because they're just jealous.

“One reason there's so much hatred among left-liberal media types toward Tucker is petty jealously: that goes without saying. They always hate most those who succeed in journalism. But he's also hated by that crowd because he holds up a mirror to the failures of their heroes.”

— Glenn Greenwald (@Glenn Greenwald) 1682360799 

Yes, everybody hates it how Tucker so successfully exposed their heroes.

Let's look closer at the tweet he quotes, where he lists the times Tucker exposed the libs:

“Tucker was the cable host who most: * Opposed US proxy war in Ukraine; * Denounced CIA, FBI and DHS for its systemic lies and corruption; * Devoted himself to a pardon for Julian Assange; * Objected to regime change efforts in Cuba; * Criticized Trump Admin's militarism.”

— Glenn Greenwald (@Glenn Greenwald) 1682354176 

Haha OK. The first example Glenn gives — "opposed US proxy war in Ukraine" — is literally propaganda directly from the bowels of the Kremlin. 

And you know how we all think the CIA and FBI and DHS are blameless and perfect in all things. Fuck Julian Assange, though, definitely. That guy is a literal actual piece of human shit. And we get why Glenn loves him. 

But sure, Glenn, we all hated Tucker because he just held up a mirror to us all the time so much. Whatever you need to tell yourself about your fallen hero.

 Glenn said "left-liberals" like Sean Hannity just fine — LOL — because Hannity is just a regular Republican who stays in his "partisan lane." Then he babbled more Russian propaganda about "Biden's proxy wars," while saying SUCK IT LIBS and posting stats of Tucker beating Maddow in the ratings one time even among Democrats:

“Left-liberals don't mind Hannity because he's a standard-issue Republican: they're comfortable with those who stay in their partisan lane. Tucker was uniquely threatening because he vocally opposed US militarism while left-liberal heroes voted to fund Biden's proxy wars. And:”

— Glenn Greenwald (@Glenn Greenwald) 1682360799 

Yes, those are definitely the reasons "left-liberals" hate Tucker.

It can't be because of him being a mouthpiece for the Kremlin and a vicious racist and a vitriolic inciter of hatred against LGBT+ people, of which Glenn Greenwald is one, among Tucker's many other sins. The pig-ignorant vaccine denialism, the fostering of the same genocidal conspiracy theories that have inspired mass shootings ...

No, it's because jealous .

OK, Glenn.

 The Portuguese warbling started sometime last night. Some of it was just repeating what he had said earlier in the day in English:

“Como sempre, as opiniões dominantes no Brasil sobre a política e a mídia dos EUA vêm da CNN e do NYT, repetidas sem pensar pela Globo, pelo Estadão e pelo grupo centrista de acadêmicos de elite desesperados para serem populares nas capitais ocidentais.🇧🇷 Sobre Tucker Carlson: 👇”

— Glenn Greenwald (@Glenn Greenwald) 1682371404 

 Other parts were insisting in Portuguese that TUCKER CARLSON IS NOT RACIST, NEOLIBERALS ARE RACIST!

“Nunca vou esquecer quando a Globo e outros 2 grandes veículos ficaram obcecados com o julgamento de Kyle Rittenhouse (sem relevância para o Brasil, mas a CNN foi fixado), e falsamente disseram que atirou em 3 homens negros, pq copiaram a mídia americana (todos foram brancos).”

— Glenn Greenwald (@Glenn Greenwald) 1682371404 

Translate them for yourselves if you'd like.

He BIG MAD INSISTED that Fox News needed his best buddy pal, coolest guy who ever talked to him, whose straight man approval he appears to craaaaaaave , far more than his buddy needed Fox News:

“There are few people in media who have their own independent following loyal to them. Tucker is one of them. If he goes to an independent platform, his audience will be even bigger and his voice more influential. Fox needed Tucker way more than Tucker needed Fox.”

— Glenn Greenwald (@Glenn Greenwald) 1682377649 

You can dive down the rabbithole of Glenn being the Peter Cetera song that will fight for Tucker's honor if you want, but please wear a full-body hazmat suit. You can't possibly keep up, though. It's so rapid-fire, it's so desperate, it's so thirsty, it's so constant. We have no idea how many hours are left in this meltdown, but we hope Glenn's husband forces him to eat a candy bar and stay hydrated while he sits around wailing about Tucker.

The funniest one we've seen so far is this one, where somebody was like LMAO you are just mad because now nobody is going to want to put your dumb ass on a real TV show.

That. Made. Glenn. Furious .

“@furiouspaul9000 @SystemUpdate_ I have invites on every Fox show weekly and constantly appear on them, including Laura Ingraham's, Jesse Water's and Howie Kurtz's. The only I haven't appeared on is Hannity though I've had invites there, too. Do you people ever tired of realizing how much you depend on lies?”

— Glenn Greenwald (@Glenn Greenwald) 1682374176 

For perpetuity, that tweet reads:

I have invites on every Fox show weekly and constantly appear on them, including Laura Ingraham's, Jesse Water's [ sic ] and Howie Kurtz's. The only I haven't appeared on is Hannity though I've had invites there, too. Do you people ever tired of realizing how much you depend on lies?  

HE HAS INVITES ON EVERY FOX SHOW WEEKLY AND GOES ON THEM CONSTANTLY, HE GOES ON LAURA INGRAHAM, HE GOES ON WITH FAMOUS LEGEND JESSE WATTERS, HE GOES ON HOWIE KURTZ, HE HASN'T GONE ON HANNITY BUT HANNITY WANTS HIM, WHY DO YOU LIE SO MUCH!

Glenn is so hot right now, he's on the Jesse Watters show, where will his career go next?

The Centrism Fan Account notes that when Glenn flew into that rage, he was replying to an account that at that time had zero followers. (It now has three as of this writing.)

Amazing.

Well, we guess Glenn will get through this whenever he gets through it, not our problem.

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And once that doesn't exist, I'm also giving things a go at the Mastodon (@evanhurst@newsie.social) and at Post! 

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