Gossip Roundup: Dumb Blondes Edition
•The Reliable Source: At a Ford Theatre gala,BushintroducesJessica Simpson,"which means we've finally introduced reality TV to the Lincoln Theater." He meant Ford, andSimpsoncongratulatedInterior Secretary Gale Nortonon "a nice job decorating the White House." [ WP ]
•Washington Whispers: George Teneton whether he plans to resign after the election: "And miss all this fun?" [ USN ]
•Heard on the Hill: KerryandJimmy Carterhave plans for a DNC fundraiser withP.Diddy, Q-Tip, and Biz Markie. . .Rep. Spencer Bachus (R-Ala.)is D.C.'s Funniest Celebrity, butRep. Brian Baird (D-Wash.)came close by playingBush: "We've created 10 million jobs - they're in India and China," or "I've talked to the vice president and he's said it's okay for me to run with him again."BairdintroducedBush's"Leave No Consonant Behind" Program and writerNorm Ornsteinexplained thatMadonnaendorsedClarkbecause "They both had a lot of soldiers underneath them." [ Roll Call ]
•Inside the Beltway: Tom Clancyon a hypothetical plane hitting the Capitol: "Nearly 300 tons of aircraft and fuel struck the east face of the building at a top speed of 300 knots. The aircraft disintegrated on impact. No less fragile than a bird, its speed and mass had already fragmented the columns outside the walls." Then the building collapses. [ WT ]
•Rush & Molloy: The former president of the Uniformed Firefighter Association had trouble getting clearance for the groundbreaking of the 9/11 memorial last week. As a cop pulled him over, he got a call fromBush."Yeah, right," said the cop as a security detail arrived. [ NYDN ]
•Cindy Adams: Hillary: "I know about winning and losing elections. In '92 we had a near-death experience. They saidBill'sdead meat and we should get the carcass off the floor." [ NYP ]
•Liz Smith: Tina BrownonRalph Nader: "There was something perversely thrilling about the old Raider's decision not to do the decent thing and lie low . . . In an era when every politician's naked ego is muffled by euphemism, his bloody-minded announcement was the political version of unprotected sex. He is willing to trash his legacy to make a point about the process." (Soundsfamiliar .) [ NYP ]