A guy I knew who had been in the Canadian peacekeeping forces on the Green Line in Cyprus told me this story. He was a sergeant, and he and a corporal spent their days out in a blockhouse on a hill whose chief feature was a huge pair of artillery spotter binoculars on a mount. One day, the corporal was scanning the largely empty countryside when he said, "Come here, sarge. Take a look at this." The sergeant looked through the binoculars, and there was a Cypriot shepherd -- Greek or Turk he diplomatically never said -- who had dropped his pants and was enthusiastically recreating with one of his ewes. The sergeant thought for a moment and reminded the corporal that according to their instructions, any unusual activity had to be made the subject of a report to UN headquarters. So, they spent the rest of the day writing the "Sheep Shagging Incident Report" and sent it in through proper channels. It's probably sitting in the files somewhere still.
Hello, old friends. It's been about a year since I posted, and I think I've got the substack thing figured out. Don't shame me, I eschew the ways of new technology for a more cottagecore lifestyle these days, but I'd still like to contribute my unfathomable sarcasm to this wonderful mommy-blog. If one of you would do me a favor by liking and commenting on this post, I can check to see if the notifications are turned off, thereby being able to return to the fold of this wonderful community, because I am poor and my phone charges by the gigabyte. Merci, s'il vous plait.
Edit: I swear on the Three Faces of Hecate that this is not a scam. If you could just comment 'test' that would be perfect. Thanks again.
Edit 2: By the Gods, I am an idiot. I could just like and comment on my own post. Sorry, bbl.
At Bryn Mawr (a WOMEN'S college, dammit!) back in the day, there was a chemistry professor who was German and rather jovial. There is an unquestionably apocryphal story that at one point early in the term, he went to one of the lab sections to meet the students and see how things were going; there had been some quizzes, but not midterm tests yet, and he asked one of the students "Vell, do you like my little quizzies?"
To which the student replied, "I can't wait to see your little testies!"
Don't know about live sheep but I think I'm allergic to ragweed. I made merry last night but I don't normally feel like I got punched in the head after 2 beers and some smoke
Be careful. I hugged a lamb at a petting zoo. Both arms broke out in a horrible rash -- maybe from the lanolin in the fleece? Sure was adorable though.
1) Good friends of ours babysat a flock for a place to live when they first moved to our neck of the woods. Then came lambing season. Mostly, everything was okay, but there were a few orphan lambs, so our friends brought them into the house to feed multiple times a day. My bff told me that the lambs were cuter than heck....
...and smelled just like lamb chops.
2) I worked in the public school system (dare I point out that ours is a SMALL community?) and one of the teachers brought in recently born lambs because there were FIVE of them and oddly enough, the ewe didn't have enough teats or milk for everybody. OMG, they were so cute and all of us took turns coddling and feeding them. There is no way I could have eaten the lamb I helped raise , although I HEART lamb.
Also, when taking our cat in for a vet visit, I heard tapping behind the receptionist's desk. She had her goat kid with her to make sure it got fed.
I know a brave veteran of that grand war. He was wounded in battle. I can’t remember if it was a paper cut or if he tripped and hurt his wrist. Although, thinking back, is it battle if you don’t fire any weapons, face no enemy fire, and are just sort of wandering around?
I actually worked for a week as a catcher on a sheering crew. Believe me, you don’t want to hug a sheep.
A guy I knew who had been in the Canadian peacekeeping forces on the Green Line in Cyprus told me this story. He was a sergeant, and he and a corporal spent their days out in a blockhouse on a hill whose chief feature was a huge pair of artillery spotter binoculars on a mount. One day, the corporal was scanning the largely empty countryside when he said, "Come here, sarge. Take a look at this." The sergeant looked through the binoculars, and there was a Cypriot shepherd -- Greek or Turk he diplomatically never said -- who had dropped his pants and was enthusiastically recreating with one of his ewes. The sergeant thought for a moment and reminded the corporal that according to their instructions, any unusual activity had to be made the subject of a report to UN headquarters. So, they spent the rest of the day writing the "Sheep Shagging Incident Report" and sent it in through proper channels. It's probably sitting in the files somewhere still.
But do we know who was the seducer, could it have not been a particularly saucy Ewe?
They hug a lot of sheep in Wyoming. Wait, I just got a note here . . .
Oh, it's not "hugging" the sheep. . .
Never mind. : )
I had a boss who liked to hug sheep when he was growing up on the farm. He said they were the best. (He was a bhaaaad man.)
The ever so tired Lili van Shtupp appeared in Blazing Saddles. Madeline Kahn played Elizabeth Lavenza in Young Frankenstein.
"So ti-yed of being ad-miyed ... "
i voted!
Hello, old friends. It's been about a year since I posted, and I think I've got the substack thing figured out. Don't shame me, I eschew the ways of new technology for a more cottagecore lifestyle these days, but I'd still like to contribute my unfathomable sarcasm to this wonderful mommy-blog. If one of you would do me a favor by liking and commenting on this post, I can check to see if the notifications are turned off, thereby being able to return to the fold of this wonderful community, because I am poor and my phone charges by the gigabyte. Merci, s'il vous plait.
Edit: I swear on the Three Faces of Hecate that this is not a scam. If you could just comment 'test' that would be perfect. Thanks again.
Edit 2: By the Gods, I am an idiot. I could just like and comment on my own post. Sorry, bbl.
test.
At Bryn Mawr (a WOMEN'S college, dammit!) back in the day, there was a chemistry professor who was German and rather jovial. There is an unquestionably apocryphal story that at one point early in the term, he went to one of the lab sections to meet the students and see how things were going; there had been some quizzes, but not midterm tests yet, and he asked one of the students "Vell, do you like my little quizzies?"
To which the student replied, "I can't wait to see your little testies!"
TEST, because we are servicey anyway! Welcome!
Test
Don't know about live sheep but I think I'm allergic to ragweed. I made merry last night but I don't normally feel like I got punched in the head after 2 beers and some smoke
Be careful. I hugged a lamb at a petting zoo. Both arms broke out in a horrible rash -- maybe from the lanolin in the fleece? Sure was adorable though.
Today, in Catruday news, read about Cats!
https://phys.org/news/2024-10-cats-associate-human-words-images.html#google_vignette
https://www.thetimes.com/uk/science/article/cats-beat-babies-at-word-association-game-tqcc0pvxw
"I’ll cue it up to the beginning of the second act, which starts with a reworking of Steinman’s Total Eclipse of the Heart."
No one will be seated during the scintillating dance on the white bleachers scene....
The best reworking of Total Eclipse of the Heart.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uDw0QeYKPhA
I have two stories about sheep (well, lambs):
1) Good friends of ours babysat a flock for a place to live when they first moved to our neck of the woods. Then came lambing season. Mostly, everything was okay, but there were a few orphan lambs, so our friends brought them into the house to feed multiple times a day. My bff told me that the lambs were cuter than heck....
...and smelled just like lamb chops.
2) I worked in the public school system (dare I point out that ours is a SMALL community?) and one of the teachers brought in recently born lambs because there were FIVE of them and oddly enough, the ewe didn't have enough teats or milk for everybody. OMG, they were so cute and all of us took turns coddling and feeding them. There is no way I could have eaten the lamb I helped raise , although I HEART lamb.
Also, when taking our cat in for a vet visit, I heard tapping behind the receptionist's desk. She had her goat kid with her to make sure it got fed.
Did I mention I live in a small town?
Do you still hear the screaming of the lambs>?
Trump should have gone ahead with his plans to build condos in North Korea. I’m sure he would have had the success he is known for.
WTF is wrong with subsnacks this time?
Happy Bestiality Foreplay Day! But would this rev Tucker's engines?
An timey reminder of our Grenada adventure and why it was BS. Since Trump loves the 1890s so much, wouldnt put it past him trying to annex Mexico or something https://www.dailykos.com/stories/2024/10/26/2278308/-Caribbean-Matters-Remembering-Urgent-Fury-Reagan-s-invasion-of-Grenada?pm_campaign=front_page&pm_source=top_news_slot_2&pm_medium=web
I know a brave veteran of that grand war. He was wounded in battle. I can’t remember if it was a paper cut or if he tripped and hurt his wrist. Although, thinking back, is it battle if you don’t fire any weapons, face no enemy fire, and are just sort of wandering around?