Helen Thomas Returns To White House To Finish Off Dana Perino

Look everyone, 124-year-old c-list wire reporter Helen Thomas is back in the Front Row of the White House Briefing Room after months of health issues! "I realized really how dedicated I was to newspapers," Thomas says, "which are dying." Nah grandma that's just hearsay; You've been watching too much CNBC! And then Thomas' legendaryarch nemesis, the ice queen press secretary Dana Perino, welcomes her back, and Thomas calls her a hot-to-trot warlord hussy. She also admits that she voted for Obama, which is not a very professional thing for a wire reporter to disclose[Commenters say she has a column now in the NYT under the pen name "Maureen Dowd"]. [ Fishbowl DC ]