18 Comments
User's avatar
Lefty Mark's avatar

They were from the suburbs, obvs.

TundraGrifter's avatar

Phil Dunphy's older brother looks like he's had a rough life. Since this media expert gig is kaput, perhaps he too should try residential real estate sales.

Gene Creemers's avatar

Anyone else think this guy kind of looks like the poor man's Hugh Jackman?

Comrade Wingtardd's avatar

How dare you liptarts denounce this hero. He was chasin "blahs", obvs. BLAH PEOPLE DID THIS

PubOption's avatar

They are barking mad.

Chris Grrr's avatar

No commandment is sacred when they're pathologically terrified.

Chris Grrr's avatar

It would be irresponsible not to be pre-emptive.

Dashboard Buddha's avatar

The main difference between a Sea Story and a Fairy Tale is: Fairy Tales begin with, "Once Upon a Time..." Sea Stories begin with, "This ain't no shit!"

Got that right from a Marine website.

Dashboard Buddha's avatar

They're generally used on a lower class of werewolf.

Gherkins d'Resistance's avatar

I might know the answer to this mystery. Is he friends with Dick Cheney, by any chance?

Ikimizi's avatar

The point is that he was a hero before this incident, not for trying to chase down imaginary thugs, but for agreeing to obey orders and not think too much about killing real brown people.

Gherkins d'Resistance's avatar

Sean Hannity's always blowing a seal.

Vienna Woods's avatar

Let me guess- they carved a backwards B in his abdomen.

Gherkins d'Resistance's avatar

Well, ok, his story may not be entirely true, but nobody can deny that black thugs do these kinds of things all the time!

--Gateway Punderp

Spotts1701, Taking Bible Guns's avatar

Ah, he gets due process rights.

A black teenager? Go Judge Dredd on 'em!