It's been a little while since we've checked in with America's Worst "Historian," David Barton; last time we talked about him was in November, when he was explaining the science of how Abortion causes climate change.Following that detour into the sciences, he seems to have returned to his primary field of study, lying about American history.
I am beginning to get it - if you precede or follow any fucking stupid idea with the words Bible, Jesus, As our Founding fathers intended, or Bengazi*, it's proof of genius.
Good to know.
*Edit: I left out "Constitution" and "God".
From people who owned slaves, and thought that women mixing freely with men would lead to "depravation of morals and ambiguity of issue" (per some guy named Thomas Jefferson), we really shouldn't be drawing too many lessons for today's world.
Silly man, of course wimmenz should vote, but only for the candidate their husband tells them to vote for, right after serving the sammiches. It's right there, in the Biblestitution.
I am beginning to get it - if you precede or follow any fucking stupid idea with the words Bible, Jesus, As our Founding fathers intended, or Bengazi*, it's proof of genius.
Good to know.
*Edit: I left out "Constitution" and "God".
That's usually what happens when I have Mexican food.
#278 Obama drones
Everyone blames Jazz. No one blames Cliffjumper or Sideswipe.
He did, however, call for a repeal of the nineteenth and twentieth centuries, in order to "get back to Real American Family Values."
From people who owned slaves, and thought that women mixing freely with men would lead to "depravation of morals and ambiguity of issue" (per some guy named Thomas Jefferson), we really shouldn't be drawing too many lessons for today's world.
#381 Census takers, Jehova&#039;s Witnesses, Girl Scouts, and anybody else who knocks on your <strike>front</strike> castle door.
#46: That guy next door whose grass is taller than you like it.
Cherchez la cream cheese.
Slippery slopes, indeed - lesbian butt sechs being the logical conclusion of such a mad scheme.
Did Barton remember to thank <strike>his mother</strike> the &quot;caller&quot; for sticking to the script?
You can&#039;t fornicate with property, so: no problem!
Just grab a cow and stick it on federal land. Then you own it. That&#039;s the Bundy Rule.
Silly man, of course wimmenz should vote, but only for the candidate their husband tells them to vote for, right after serving the sammiches. It&#039;s right there, in the Biblestitution.
To be fair, fictional history is so much more fun to learn.
David Barton is to history what Jenny McCarthy is to medicine.