How To Stay Unfertile With These Williams-Sonoma Gadgets That Look Like The Thing From Se7en

Do you like to #read things on the #internet? Then have we got happy nice time links for you!

John Oliver yelled at Hobby Lobby, because Jesus Fucking Christ Hobby Lobby. That is all.

Your comrade Mojopo had some tips for girls who wish to remain unfertile. Mojopo is not a doctor, but does recommend smoking cigarettes. (We recommend a tipped uterus.) Girls, stay in school.

Dan came in for some Man Time, with a preview of USA vs. Belgium, the miserable fat bastards. Dan is funny. For a man. 

Sara noted that Belgium is just a fucking nation of Etsy. 

She also licked some Canadians' asses? Unclear.

And, in other important Hobby Lobby news, she found six things from Williams-Sonoma that look like specula, stirrups, and other important items for #womenshealth.

All the Pulitzers please, and have a smurfy day!