In what we fear could be the start of a trend, a Boise teenager who is definitely not Kid Zoom or any of his friends crashed a Ford Bronco Sunday after his 16-year-old front seat passenger reached over and set the driver's armpit hair on fire with a lighter.
I have a friend who rolled his Bronco, with almost identical damage to the roof. He's been in a wheelchair for the past 20 years. And two passengers ejected without getting steamrollered? These kids are un-be-fucking-lievably lucky.
Cops, for some reason, just LOVE ticketing accident victims. I once hit a patch of black ice and slid off into a ditch; cop handed me a ticket for going "too fast for conditions". Gee, thanks, officer - nothing like a moving violation, and points, to perfect a day already graced with towing and front-end repairs. Helpful fucker, he was.
"Myers initially told deputies that his speeding and swerving resulted from trying to avoid an animal in the road"
Yeah, I always speed when trying to avoid animals in the road. I figure, the less time you spend on the road, the less likely you are to hit a critter. And if you do hit a critter, momentum is your friend, also too.
Either that, or the "speeding" in this case might have meant going 25 mph in a 15 mph zone. And then catching a wheel on a tall curb.
damn good thing it wasn't a Ford Pinto.
I have a friend who rolled his Bronco, with almost identical damage to the roof. He's been in a wheelchair for the past 20 years. And two passengers ejected without getting steamrollered? These kids are un-be-fucking-lievably lucky.
In this case, a near-fatal flaw.
Soon to be printed on a decal, above the visors of all new cars.
Cops, for some reason, just LOVE ticketing accident victims. I once hit a patch of black ice and slid off into a ditch; cop handed me a ticket for going "too fast for conditions". Gee, thanks, officer - nothing like a moving violation, and points, to perfect a day already graced with towing and front-end repairs. Helpful fucker, he was.
This is Idaho -- they get to clown around with real guns.
Driver, for sure . . . but do they really care about the passengers' BAC?
GOP driver, teabagger passenger ... yep, it's just about perfect.
"Myers initially told deputies that his speeding and swerving resulted from trying to avoid an animal in the road"
Yeah, I always speed when trying to avoid animals in the road. I figure, the less time you spend on the road, the less likely you are to hit a critter. And if you do hit a critter, momentum is your friend, also too.
Awareness of what? The Near-Darwin Awards?
"I kept looking and looking, but I never found the exit to Chicopee..."
Needz moar Lentils!
Either that, or the "speeding" in this case might have meant going 25 mph in a 15 mph zone. And then catching a wheel on a tall curb.
Will the defense of the pyro be that his daddy didn't whoop him enough when he was a young'un?
Just manly bravado to impress the ladies in the backseat. Chicks go for that stuff.
Next up: The Lighter Fluid Bucket Challenge!
The stupid, it burns.