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Is Rand Paul a Board-Certified Ophthalmologist? Rand Paul IS an Ophthalmology Board

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Is Rand Paul a Board-Certified Ophthalmologist? Rand Paul IS an Ophthalmology Board

Jack Stuef
Jun 15, 2010
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Is Rand Paul a Board-Certified Ophthalmologist? Rand Paul IS an Ophthalmology Board

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By night, one-man rLOVEution Rand Paul is a libertarian hero. By day, he has a job as an ophthalmologist, a kind of eye doctor that heals people who can't see liberty. Except the American Board of Ophthalmology, the board that certifies ophthalmologists, says he isn't one.

Rand Paul, however, likes to tell people he is "board-certified." Though he isn't board-certified by the American Board of Ophthalmology, he is certified by the National Board of Ophthalmology. That latter "group" though is an organization led by Rand Paul. More accurately, the National Board of Ophthalmology is Rand Paul. You have to give it to him, the guy is good at naming his groups things that sound real.

Rand Paul's board has recognized a whopping seven doctors to do ophthalmology versus the 16,000 the American Board has. He's probably lost some business at his eye-poking practice because The Market has provided us insurance companies that prefer not to give their money to random men by the side of dirt roads in Kentucky who say they do eye surg'ry good.

But are we right to assume the American Board is a better board simply because it's recognized 2,286 times more doctors? Perhaps those 16,000 doctors went to Rand Paul for certification first but were denied because he's really strict about who gets certified. That's probably it. Rand Paul's list of criteria probably looks like this:

1. Has to be Rand Paul or be friends with Rand Paul.

2. Rand Paul has no friends besides his dad, so we'll define "friends" here as "people who are not statists."

3. Has to yell something incomprehensible about criteria taking away his or her God-given ophthalmology freedom and kick Rand Paul's clipboard out of his hands.

Did you meet those requirements? Congratulations, you're an ophthalmologist! [ Salon ]

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Is Rand Paul a Board-Certified Ophthalmologist? Rand Paul IS an Ophthalmology Board

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Is Rand Paul a Board-Certified Ophthalmologist? Rand Paul IS an Ophthalmology Board

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Reese
Aug 22

"In 1995, Paul passed the American Board of Ophthalmology (ABO) boards on his first attempt and earned board-certification under the ABO for 10 years.

Prior to this, in 1992, the ABO had changed their certification program, which had previously awarded lifetime certifications, instead requiring doctors to recertify every 10 years. Those who had already been given lifetime certification were allowed to keep it (according to the ABO, they would not legally have been able to rescind these certifications).[24] Shortly after this change, Paul began a campaign to protest it."

make the joke news more realistic plz! :P

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