It's Raining Men ... Hallelujah? Tabs, Mon., Feb. 27, 2023

Is Mother Nature really single? How is that any of your business?

It's Monday, Wonkers. Let's get after it!

OMFG, the ivermectin weirdos are back! Now they're touting it as a cure for the common cold and also the flu. Of course! Apparently, Woody Harrelson may have promoted this bullshit on Saturday Night Live, so, if you're wondering why the actor was trending on Twitter but didn't actually care enough to click ... now you know why. [ WaPo ]

Ronna Romney McDaniel announced this week that the RNC will require all presidential candidates to sign a loyalty pledge if they want to take part in debates next year. If they don't pinky promise to support the party's eventual nominee, they can't shout on stage about cancel culture and critical race theory. Trump took a break from implying that Ron DeSantis is a pedophile to say that his support would depend on the eventual nominee. So ... good luck, Ronna! [ Politico ]

Good Lord this exposé on migrant children being exploited in America is GRIM. The piece focuses on migrant youth who are placed with American sponsors and then sent to work long hours in factories producing those Nature Valley granola bars and Cheerios we all feed to our own children. If we ever used to be a proper country, we sure as hell aren't now. [ NYT ]

The Dilbert douche finally managed to say something racist enough to get his stupid cartoon canceled, and Elon Musk managed to find a way to tarnish his brand even more. After Scott Adams called Black people a "hate group," the Twitter and Tesla CEO tweeted that actually , the media is “ racist against whites & Asians .” You're doing great, sweetie! [ WaPo ]

The lab leak theory of COVID-19 origin is getting some support from the [checks notes] Energy Department??? The DOE's assessment that the global pandemic was the result of a manmade virus which inadvertently escaped from a lab was made with "low confidence," according to the Journal's sources. But the news is likely to light a fire in the loins of freaks like Rand Paul, who have long hoped to make political hay out of accusing Dr. Anthony Fauci of cahootsing with China to murder Americans. Wheee! [ WSJ ]  

That ranting nutter from Georgia isn't the only one fanning the flames of secessionism and civil war with fairy tales about a non-existent Christian heyday that existed some time in the past — they can't put their finger on when. There are plenty of people in the Mountain West who are itching to split from us Godless liberal heathens to get back to that fictional American Eden they long for. Check out this longread at ... [ Vanity Fair ]

Media Matters producer Kat Abughazaleh tells reporter Clare Malone what it's like to watch Tucker Carlson for a living. Spoiler Alert: Weird AF ... and probably not great for your longterm mental health. Although if anyone's got the stomach for this shit, it's the born-online GenZees. Money quote: People need to know that the scary things are stupid as well. They either go all in on ‘Oh, my God, this is so funny’ and ‘Fox News is technically entertainment,’ or they go all in on ‘This is so scary, blah blah blah.’ It’s both things. Two things can be true at once.” [ New Yorker ]

Fox News anchor Howard Kurtz revealed that management has barred him from covering the Dominion Voting Systems lawsuit against the network, particularly the salacious texts unsealed in court filings last week that make it crystal clear that everyone in the C-suite and all the major "talent" knew damn well there was no serious vote fraud in 2020, even as they fanned the Big Lie flames on air. It's an interesting question, right? Should the network comment on pending litigation against it? Would it be better for Fox to play serious, big boy journalists and discuss the news of the day? Or would it be impossible for Fox to cover it impartially? One thing is clear, though: Editorial independence is really not a thing at in King Rupert's realm. [ Daily Beast ]

And, finally, if you want to hear Your FDF callProject Veritas'sfreelance jackass James O'Keefe a degenerate at length, that's an option. [ OpenArgs ]

Click the widget to keep your Wonkette ad-free and feisty. And if you're ordering from Amazon, use this link, because reasons .