It's No Axis of Evil or Anything, But We're Still Pretty Proud
Mr. Sun lets you write your own George W. Bush stump speech:
Thank you for that warm welcome. It's great to be under the complete control of Dick Cheney ! This election may well be the most important in history. Now more than ever, America needs John Ashcroft reading your email . My opponent is on both sides of every issue. You know what I stand for: a bill our grandchildren cannot possibly pay . If I am re-elected, in my first two weeks I pledge to have a chuckle about it with Prince Bandar . After September 11, I stood in the rubble with a bullhorn and shouted: We will have vengeance against the people who didn't do this! Now, three years later -- I ask for you to at least get me to the Supreme Court; I'll take it from there . I have been blessed in my life, and I want you to know that laws have a lot of big words that I don't understand . In conclusion, I would like to say I love scotch. Scotchy, scotch, scotch .
Goes a little Ron Burgandy at the end there, but mostly we're pretty sure it's the same one he gave in Toledo.