When in grad school as a young man I worked a number of very odd jobs. One year I worked as a backup/relief Santa in a large department store in Atlanta. I was a twenty something needing a large amount of padding and a fake beard and wig and trying to make my voice sound deeper. I tended to work the low traffic hours when most kids were not out shopping with mom so I saw mostly pre-schoolers who were largely terrified. I got peed on more than a couple of times, but fortunately had spare Santa suit parts. I never did it again.
I dressed as an elf for a community group holding a children’s xmas party. Overheard two women say the three of us who dressed as elves had Peter Pan complex. Ya’, fuck you Grinches, I thought.
Hubby loves stupid christmas movies but we never watched ELF because Will Ferrell is so goofy. We decided to watch this year and it's LOL funny and sweet and he's perfect for the part. I'm still laughing at cotton headed ninny muggins. Bob Newhart and Ed Asner are both delightful.
There was a guy who spoke in public comment at tonight's City Council meeting whose last name is Keibler, pronounced Keebler. That can't be easy to have grown up with.
I knew a girl in middle school and high school with that last name (spelled the same way too). We had one English teacher who would make that joke once in a while. To her credit, she took it in stride.
Interesting story about the woman in the nursing home, especially since I live in Bloomington IL and read the Pantagraph paper. (I didn't live here in the 1970's though). The Bartonville "insane asylum" now functions every fall as a haunted house venue. Too early for DNA to have been in use to help. So sad how people were treated (particularly for unwanted pregnancies too).
Heritage Foundation staffers going to hang with Pence:
HuffPost: "A total of 13 staff members are leaving the Heritage Foundation to join Advancing American Freedom, founded by Mike Pence in 2021 as he began laying the groundwork for an ultimately unsuccessful run for president in 2024. The news comes after two Heritage board members announced they were leaving because of director Kevin Robert’s defense of conspiracy theorist Tucker Carlson's defense of Nick Fuentes, who has expressed views admiring Adolf Hitler."
Possibly mentioned elsewhere, but the Felonious Fuck is still obsessing over Greenland - and has decided to slap Denmark in the nose and appoint a "special envoy" - Jeff Landry, Governor of Louisiana. Landry has already made a public statement that he aims to make Greenland part of the US.
Apparently, Landry thinks he can do both jobs, altho' it's unclear whether he could continue as Governor once he takes the "special envoy" position ( and naming Landry to that position sure puts a new meaning of "special" )
Never understood the appeal of humiliating oneself in the name of “brotherhood.” When I was an undergraduate, one fraternity stole the headstone from the grave of a boy who died of AIDS as a “prank.”
HuffPost: "CBS News editor-in-chief Bari Weiss spoke about her decision to pull a story from Sunday’s episode of “60 Minutes,” arguing “it wasn’t ready,” according to The New York Times’ Ben Mullin.
“The story presented very powerful testimony of abuse at [the El Salvadorian prison] CECOT, but that testimony has already been reported on by places like The [New York] Times,” she said on an editorial call Monday, per Mullin. “The public knows that Venezuelans have been subjected to horrific treatment in this prison. So to run a story on this subject, two months later, we simply need to do more.”
Weiss also reportedly requested the reporters “make every effort to get the principles on the record and on camera.” Sharyn Alfonsi, who put together the segment that was pulled from the broadcast, pushed back against spiking the story due to a lack of response from officials in the Trump administration. Alfonsi said in an internal email, “If the administration’s refusal to participate becomes a valid reason to spike a story, we have effectively handed them a ‘kill switch’ for any reporting they find inconvenient.”"
Your header gif info: https://martiniambassador.substack.com/p/buddy-the-elf
And meme chat: https://open.substack.com/chat/posts/2524d24b-b06c-4959-be23-f8420b8a1361?utm_source=share
Martini, you outdid yourself! Brilliant. And Ed Asner would definitely approve.
The header gif this morning was brilliant!
Superb gif, Martini!
Wonderful start this holiday week, Martini! (although I missed the Ray’s Pizza reference).
Peace and Love to all Wonkettedom 💕
Thank you! To you and yours as well, also too!
Ho, ho, ho.
When in grad school as a young man I worked a number of very odd jobs. One year I worked as a backup/relief Santa in a large department store in Atlanta. I was a twenty something needing a large amount of padding and a fake beard and wig and trying to make my voice sound deeper. I tended to work the low traffic hours when most kids were not out shopping with mom so I saw mostly pre-schoolers who were largely terrified. I got peed on more than a couple of times, but fortunately had spare Santa suit parts. I never did it again.
David Sedaris’s story of being an elf at Christmas is hilarious.
As WC Fields said never work with children or animals.
Little elf, little elf . . .
I've played Santa, but only for ferrets, because ferrets deserve to get their picture taken with Santa also, too.
I dressed as an elf for a community group holding a children’s xmas party. Overheard two women say the three of us who dressed as elves had Peter Pan complex. Ya’, fuck you Grinches, I thought.
That's such a sweet story! I'm glad you were a good Santa to them.
The toddlers relieved themselves on the relief Santa. What did you expect?
It was a urination revelation.
Relief Santa is a lovely job title, though.
As a white beard old man I've been mistaken for Santa a time or two. Never peed on, fortunately.
🎶"What's it all about, Elfie? "🎶
Awesome! I don't usually have time to do TABS so I'm glad I managed it this morning!
Wonkette on the naughty list? Well, I never! ( I certainly have)
That GIF is the Santa's Kiss! 🎅🏾💋
Best TABS gif ever!!! Nicely done.
Bob Newhart is so delightful in this movie. As always.
Hubby loves stupid christmas movies but we never watched ELF because Will Ferrell is so goofy. We decided to watch this year and it's LOL funny and sweet and he's perfect for the part. I'm still laughing at cotton headed ninny muggins. Bob Newhart and Ed Asner are both delightful.
"You sit on a throne of lies!"
It is sweet, isn't it? The Candy Salad scene cracks me up.
Brilliant!
So, what elf is new?
I've just been Keebler to myself lately.
There was a guy who spoke in public comment at tonight's City Council meeting whose last name is Keibler, pronounced Keebler. That can't be easy to have grown up with.
I knew a girl in middle school and high school with that last name (spelled the same way too). We had one English teacher who would make that joke once in a while. To her credit, she took it in stride.
As a short person from a family of tall people, I have to ask how tall she was.
I'm in a wheelchair and therefore always sitting down so pretty much everybody's tall to me. LOL but she was probably about 4' 11"?
Hands down, Peter Dinklage as angry elf never fails to reduce me to tears laughing.
That is my favorite scene in the movie.
Today's gif is incredible! Could not stop laughing. Thanks for a great start to the day.
Interesting story about the woman in the nursing home, especially since I live in Bloomington IL and read the Pantagraph paper. (I didn't live here in the 1970's though). The Bartonville "insane asylum" now functions every fall as a haunted house venue. Too early for DNA to have been in use to help. So sad how people were treated (particularly for unwanted pregnancies too).
I mean is Bondi really "breaking the law" if there are no consequences other than a milquetoast lawsuit that can't get past SCROTUS? I submit no.
https://open.substack.com/pub/michaelharkin/p/solstice-prayers?r=3j0cc&utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=web&showWelcomeOnShare=true
Look, I realise grief strikes people in different ways, but Erika Kirk's seems... hmmm, unusual for a loving wife?
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Read the titles of all the other articles that are up, and retreated to the safety, all things being relative, of this one.
Heritage Foundation staffers going to hang with Pence:
HuffPost: "A total of 13 staff members are leaving the Heritage Foundation to join Advancing American Freedom, founded by Mike Pence in 2021 as he began laying the groundwork for an ultimately unsuccessful run for president in 2024. The news comes after two Heritage board members announced they were leaving because of director Kevin Robert’s defense of conspiracy theorist Tucker Carlson's defense of Nick Fuentes, who has expressed views admiring Adolf Hitler."
All creepy
I wish everyone would use the Oxford Comma -- some complex sentences don't make sense if they don't have that little pause.
have you ever read Ulysses?
Or Finnegan's Wake? The horror.
took me almost 10 years...but I got through it...
OMG How did you do it? Awwwwww…….
persistence...
But if everyone used it, then those of us who do would not be special, thus defeating the entire purpose of the Oxford,.
They wanted to break the government and they didn’t care who it would hurt. That WaPo article says it all.
I'd CETAINLY steam clean my panties if I was married to our current president. I'd invoke the nuclear codes, too.
"ICE declared that her real birth certificate and medical records were fake "
Was she actually Kenyan?
( Hmmm, I could have sworn I've heard that allegation somewhere before.... )
When I said in January that they were going to do this I was told - by lots of White people - that I was overreacting
Possibly mentioned elsewhere, but the Felonious Fuck is still obsessing over Greenland - and has decided to slap Denmark in the nose and appoint a "special envoy" - Jeff Landry, Governor of Louisiana. Landry has already made a public statement that he aims to make Greenland part of the US.
Apparently, Landry thinks he can do both jobs, altho' it's unclear whether he could continue as Governor once he takes the "special envoy" position ( and naming Landry to that position sure puts a new meaning of "special" )
Ridiculous!
Plastic face piece of recycled trash Nicki Minaj trashing Newsome makes me like him even more.
From the Slate article, the University of Florida’s student government sounds fucked up.
Run by the Greek system. Of course it's fucked.
Never understood the appeal of humiliating oneself in the name of “brotherhood.” When I was an undergraduate, one fraternity stole the headstone from the grave of a boy who died of AIDS as a “prank.”
I hear frat culture is even worse in the south.
Go Gators?
Sorry. As good as it is to know they suffered (not enough), seeing such brutality is just horrible.
HuffPost: "CBS News editor-in-chief Bari Weiss spoke about her decision to pull a story from Sunday’s episode of “60 Minutes,” arguing “it wasn’t ready,” according to The New York Times’ Ben Mullin.
“The story presented very powerful testimony of abuse at [the El Salvadorian prison] CECOT, but that testimony has already been reported on by places like The [New York] Times,” she said on an editorial call Monday, per Mullin. “The public knows that Venezuelans have been subjected to horrific treatment in this prison. So to run a story on this subject, two months later, we simply need to do more.”
Weiss also reportedly requested the reporters “make every effort to get the principles on the record and on camera.” Sharyn Alfonsi, who put together the segment that was pulled from the broadcast, pushed back against spiking the story due to a lack of response from officials in the Trump administration. Alfonsi said in an internal email, “If the administration’s refusal to participate becomes a valid reason to spike a story, we have effectively handed them a ‘kill switch’ for any reporting they find inconvenient.”"
Isn't it principals, not principles.
what a load a cya bs