991 Comments
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Doktor Zoom's avatar

Oh noes! I was in a hurry so I forgot to mention that after he finished speaking, Vance was played off to the guitar solo from Fleetwood Mac's "Don't Stop Thinkin' About Tomorrow," and you could actually hear the 1992 Clinton Democratic Convention roll over in its grave.

I would add that but my new laptop won't let me edit anything that's already been posted, probably some weird Chrome hiccup I need to figure out.

IVote's avatar

My husband is a walking/talking DJ, he told me about the music! LOL

marydn's avatar

I know Hamilton and the Crew already thanked you but I want to emphasize how much the kittens are appreciated. I have hated JD Vance for so many reasons and can not believe he is a fucking senator and now a possible VP. I'll be seeing that smarmy ass face every where now. Jesus Fucking Christ on a cracker this country is so fucked up. So thank you so very much for the kittehs, Dok. You the man!

Brianna Amore's avatar

It's APPALLING how the most mediocre white men manage to fail upwards in this fucked up country. And under a new Trumpian Fourth Reich, this will only get MUCH, MUCH worse.

Pisto75666-Radical Left Scum's avatar

Leave it to the Republicans to use a song that they don't actually know what it means...and also co-opt it from Bill Clinton

Mexfiles's avatar

The snarky correspondents for the Mexican intellectual daily La Jornada (the only newspaper I know where opinion pieces often have footnotes and bibliography) -- venturing into enemy territory by covering the convention -- love the incongruity of Trump's entry to the "gay anthem" Y.M.C.A. And the other day, opening their convention with another old gay bar standard: Celebrate Good Times (c'mon).

Regret's avatar

All writing that mentions anything resembling a theory should have a bibliography. I consider the lack of one proof they just pulled this out of their ass. Like this comment of mine: Just pulled it out my ass.

Richard S's avatar

I recall that the first time PAB was made the GOP candidate, the convention's closing song was "You Can't Always Get What You Want".

I have no idea what they were thinking - or smoking.

Oblio's Cap's avatar

I think it how they were using it without permission and screwing them commie musicians.

HarryButtle, degenerate artist's avatar

No Dueling Banjos for the hillbilly?

Trux Mint In Box's avatar

Weird because my first thought was the Pita food truck display from The Simpsons

Villago Delenda Est 🇺🇦's avatar

You could hear Christine McVie rolling over in her grave, too.

Lionel “8647” Hutz's avatar

But she has stopped dreaming about tomorrow.

Always Be Ithacating's avatar

She has some regrets from the grave, I imagine. Seeing her with Chicken Shack when I was 15 had a lasting impact on me. That was a brutal industry for young women to navigate.

DaveB's avatar

To sleep - perchance to dream...

Revenant's avatar

Aye, there's the rub- for in that sleep of death what dreams may come, when we have shuffled off this mortal coil?

Ron Spangler's avatar

The Democratic Party's downfall started with Bill Clinton and the 1992 convention. If the Democrats had stayed Democrats instead of becoming Republican-lite...

Nick Sr.'s avatar

I'm with you on being disappointed with the Clinton years, but I'm pretty sure the Democrats had some serious problems before Clinton. The first three Presidential elections of my lifetime were all in the 80's and in those elections the Dems lost 45 states, 49 states, and 40 states, respectively.

Darth Trad's avatar

Only President who didn't send Americans overseas to die in a war.

Revenant's avatar

the guy who fixed the deficit? the one who presided over eight years of peace and prosperity? the one who balanced the budget and brought in a surplus WITHOUT doing it all by fucking over the poor? what a monster.

Regret's avatar

Peace? That's news to me, as far as I know the USA is always at war.

Robert Eckert's avatar

That's what makes the Clinton years so unusual. Bush Sr. stuck our Marines into Somalia in his last days as an f-u to the new Administration, but Clinton got them out and did not send our troops to fight anywhere.

Regret's avatar

Hang on, checking Wikipedia...

Wars started during Clinton's period (1993-2001):

Haiti, Kosovo, and that's it. You're right, that is quite peaceful for USA terms. Just two small wars and they actually ended quickly.

Robert Eckert's avatar

Ah, I'd forgotten about Kosovo. But I wouldn't really count Haiti as a "war"

Notreelyhelping's avatar

Yeah, that was fucking terrible. Luckily, Chimpy righted the boat when SCOTUS slid him in between the pages.

Which is to say, our recall of the past greatly differs. I believe there was a guy called Obama who was in there too. As I remember, he did all right.

After 12 fucking years of Ronnie and Bush senior, Clinton was oxygen to a nation drowning in nihilism. He was center-left, not some conservative Trojan horse, so please quit trying to rewrite history because you didn’t get a fucking pony.

Note: I might be a little fucking cranky this morning.

Revenant's avatar

Never, ever let any of us forget that practically the first thing the shiny new Chimpy/Cheney regime was loot the surplus to send out, under Chimpy's signature, checks for chickenfeed (I think mine was for $106) plus a cover letter to drive home the pitch that this was all due to the warm-hearted generosity of Dubya.

Vagenda and Peeara's avatar

Bill Clinton was a very popular POTUS. He finished with a Gallup poll approval rating of 65%, higher than that of every other departing president measured since Harry Truman. Note that he was MORE popular than Reagan, because he left a booming economy.

I would hardly call that a "downfall." Jimmy Carter lost 49 of 50 states in 1980, because Republicans promised to cut everyone's taxes and we'd all get rich, and they are better with the economy. Luckily for them, we just ceded that talking point to them.

Robert Eckert's avatar

*Walter Mondale lost 49 of 50 states in *1984

Vagenda and Peeara's avatar

I thought Carter just won GA, but Carter actually won 6 states, plus DC. Reagan still creamed him.

PaulDietzel's avatar

And Al Gore thought that Bill was damaged goods because of "blowjobgate" which nobody actually cared about. If Al had been smart enough to let Bill (65%, see above) campaign for him he not GWB would have ascended to the White House in 2001.

Pexas Teat's avatar

If he were smarter he'd have never picked Lieberman

Vagenda and Peeara's avatar

Gore would have won if our own far left hadn't voted for Ralph Nader in Florida. They always want to teach the rest of us a lesson, and they always do.

They always teach me how horrific the GQP is, and how miserable my own life becomes under Republican rule. I lost my life savings and my retirement in 2008. They also taught close to a million Iraqis how to lose their lives. So, uhhh. thanks for that lesson, I guess?

Pexas Teat's avatar

Plus some other stuff, in Florida and elsewhere.

I don't understand why people can't see the reality of how Republicans are terrible and worse in every way than the imperfect Democratic candidate.

Vagenda and Peeara's avatar

Al Gore and his wife were a couple of prudes. Bill Clinton was popular with the white working class, and black people. He's the last Dem who got both of those groups.

Revenant's avatar

But I still have to be grateful to him for "Futurama"

DaveB's avatar

Anything to save us from trickle down economics for 8 years was a good thing.

Vagenda and Peeara's avatar

He's also just an excellent politician who communicates well.

Milo's avatar

In 1992 the Democrats had held the presidency for precisely 4 of the previous 24 years. That's not great actually! Whatever you think the golden age of Democratic political effectiveness was, it ended well before 1992.

skinnercitycyclist's avatar

Let's just say it died in 1968 in Chicago.

Dorothea is a Democrat's avatar

NO idea what you're talking about. We currently hold 2 out of 3 branches of government. WHAR DOWNFALL?

Maybe's avatar

And at this point the word "government" is questionable since little governing is being done, especially in the House.

Parakeetist's avatar

I hope Fleetwood Mac sues the hell out of 'em.

Old Man Yells at Cloud's avatar

Fleetwood Mac probably doesn't own the song. Whatever corporate media conglomerate that does own will probably let them use it for free in exchange for some clicks

Revenant's avatar

really? not overseas? a minor bauble pocketed by some Chinese or Russian oligarch?

Johnny Appleseed's avatar

They'll end up having the RNC pay millions so Trump can claim victory, again!

Dirty-Work's avatar

Don't Stop Sueing Until Tomorrow.

Daniel's avatar

I don't know. They've always seemed pretty live-and-let-live, no capacity for bitterness or spite in them.

Jezdukowski's avatar

And no one ever blew cocaine up anyone's butthole.

Villago Delenda Est 🇺🇦's avatar

Dang it, cats startled! Look at Stevie giving Lindsey sideeye during this performance: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p8Ojjn35kP8

Carstonio's avatar

As much as I respect the band, Stevie Nicks’ lyrics in and out of the band are so elliptical that the 45s should have come with Cliff’s Notes.

Ward From Cali's avatar

Don't Stop is a Christine McVie song.

Carstonio's avatar

I know. A much different lyricist, and unlike Nicks it’s clear what her songs are about. I originally assumed that “Edge of Seventeen” was about a creepy house - Wikipedia says it’s about her grief over the loss of both John Lennon and a family member in one week.

Ward From Cali's avatar

And inspired by Tom Petty's wife, who told Nicks that she met Petty at the “age of seventeen.” With her Southern accent, of course.

Always Be Ithacating's avatar

Maybe your new laptop has a protective feature that hides "Don't Stop Thinkin' About Tomorrow"? I would not turn that off if I had it by default.

Menotsure's avatar

Don't! ...

Stop thinkin' about tomorrow!

Mr Canoehead/M Tête-Canoë's avatar

Just like the Supreme Court's "No, one is above the law."

Daniel's avatar

[leaning in and sweaty] It'll soon be here.

I'll be here, [sarcastically] "better than before"

[scared and angry] Yesterday's gone. [Sadly] Yesterday's gone.

Menotsure's avatar

It's all in how you parse it.

JustPixelz's avatar

I'm sure there are plenty of Russian hackers at the RNC convention who can help you.

Menotsure's avatar

I find it hard to think about tomorrow as July 19th, 1955. They seem not to.

"M"'s avatar

When Jim Crow made parts of America a closed fascist state

Bill's avatar

I grew up in Florida. It was as thoroughly racist as any (other) Deep South state was, before the Civil Rights Act.

Now it is again…

Oblio's Cap's avatar

Lots of rural counties.

Jezdukowski's avatar

Same. I experienced culture shock when I came back after 10 years in California.

Menotsure's avatar

I lived there as a child.

"M"'s avatar

A lot of us still do

Robert Eckert's avatar

Still living as a child? If you have to live there I guess that's the best way to do it.

Linoleum von Curmudgeon, Esq.'s avatar

Chosen for effect.

The effect of ruining the song.

Cheers Y'all's avatar

Probably the best campaign song ever, I remember it well in '92.

First POTUS campaign I ever volunteered for.

Mighty Little Dog's avatar

No, the best campaign song would be Metallica’s “And Justice For All”

LoCoJo's avatar

I always wanted someone to play King Nothing as he boarded AF1 for the last time. Can we play it when we drop his dick in the dirt (with votes) in November?

Lionel “8647” Hutz's avatar

I always liked HIllary's choiced of Sabbath's "War Pigs."

Antifa Commander's avatar

Trump playing the Misfits’ I Want Your Skulls was a little too on-point, though.

KEITH TAYLOR's avatar

Hmmm. Conceivably that poor frail old woman at the end of her life who couldn't get around so well (if Vance didn't simply invent her) was plagued at that stage by a failing mind. If she heard a sound which she thought sinister and fumbled in haste for a firearm, she might have blown her own foot off, or worse, shot herself in the head. Actually, that could happen even if she still had her wits about her, due to her wrists and fingers no longer being nimble. Aged and alone, with 19 loaded handguns in her house? If a burglar did break in, he might well get his mitts on one of them before she did. Take it any way you like, that's a recipe for disaster.

Major Is My Spirit Animal's avatar

"Hardscrabble"

Is that where you play with half the vowels removed?

Wowdad's avatar

Once again, I'm calling bullshit on JD Vance's hillbilly roots. Look at that plump little face, that fucker has never missed a meal in his life. Hardscrabble my ass.

Kathy's avatar

If you read Hillbilly Elegy (and I did - wtf was I thinking?) you find out that his parents had an income of over 6 figures. In the 90s. Think about that! In other words, he must have started growing those plump little jowls early on.

Wowdad's avatar

Oh, it's Beverly Hillbilly Elegy! And thank you for your service, in reading his book for us. Respect.

Richard Von Busack's avatar

Excellent critique of Schvantz’s bullshit speech

Mommadillo's avatar

It takes real balls for Republicans to blame NAFTA on Democrats. Put it this way - if only House Republicans had voted, NAFTA still would have passed by an overwhelming margin. If only House Democrats had voted, it would have failed miserably.

Republicans are a pack of fucking liars. There’s not an honest person anywhere in the party anymore.

https://www.citizen.org/article/final-house-vote-on-nafta/

Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

I learned all I needed to know about Hillbilly Elegy at the East Palestine train derailment.

Within three hours, Ohio Senator Sherrod Brown, Pennsylvania Senator John Fetterman, and Pennsylvania Governor Josh Shapiro were on the scene. The next morning, Vance clearly woke up and realized he was supposed to be doing something and immediately rushed to the scene where he stood around, no idea what he should be doing there as a Senator, getting in everyone's way.

Chump and Hillbilly Elegy have a total of five and a half years of elected experience between them.

ames's avatar

It wasn't about the protection, it was about the dementia-based hoarding. My Mom hoards catfood for her beloved cat, which is annoying but cute. I guess Vance's Mawmaw had nothing but guns to love and appreciate, which makes him suck even harder for me. Really? Your supposedly beloved Mawmaw had nothing but guns at the end of her life? No family? No care? Nothing but terrified paranoia? Fuck all the way off!

Hank Napkin's avatar

Uh, this whole Trump / Vance business has a decidedly Tiberius / Caligula vibe. Throw in an as-seen-on-teevee MyPillow and... History Repeats!

Daniel O'Riordan's avatar

Chump picked Hillbilly Elegy to bring in that important youth vote.

He's this generation's Dan Quayle without the depth of political experience.

BlueSpot's avatar

Sounds like Mamaw went batshit crazy before she died.

Zyxomma's avatar

Ta, Dok. So was the grandmother suffering from dementia, or was she just plain nuts? Discuss.

Dave Zirkle's avatar

Vance is a fucking idiot. End of line.

Kathy's avatar

I read the book too and I don't disrespect Mamaw. But I hugely disrespect Vance.

Also, when old people horde guns or continue to drive their cars after they've become a menace, responsible grandchildren step in. They don't cackle to themselves and then use it as campaign propaganda.

Sunshine Moonshine's avatar

I worry about everything. I find things to worry about if things seem okay.

I have stayed up worrying about the dinosaurs coming back, like Jurassic Park. I have worried about the sun burning through the ozone layer and turning into a laser that melts everything it touches (saw it in a movie, must be real).

I have made my peace with being dino food, and I used to have a plan, in LA, to get to JPL or the science museum and get inside a vehicle meant for space. Once I have a plan in place, I can sleep, even if that plan is Game Over Man.

But now, I lay in bed at night and hear sounds that are probably the murderers breaking into the house to kill my family. It doesn't matter that the dog isn't barking. They either already killed her, OR, well, she's old and sometimes doesn't hear things when she's sleeping.

I'll tell myself, 'Sunshine, you're ridiculous, and it's not murderers, it's just normal house sounds, just like EVERY other time you heard sounds.' But then I'll hear another sound, and my brain is like 'nah, THIS time it really is the murderers' and I force myself to go check. So far, no murderers, but this happens more often than I should admit.

What I am saying is: I am extremely irrationally anxious about intruders (logic doesn't exist after midnight) and yet, during the day when logic prevails, I don't go out and buy a gun, or many guns.

Mawmaw had too many guns.

CJLB's avatar

Oh for a news organization that would mention this stuff.

funnyhaha's avatar

Seriously, fuck your mamaw.

Richard Von Busack's avatar

And fuck his Peepaw! Fred Willard’s Law: there is no oaf like a Buckeye State oaf.