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Jersey City Dem Pees All Over D.C. Nightclubbers
Once upon a time there was a city called "Jersey City," and people moved there to live when Manhattan got too expensive. A gentleman politician from this fine city made headlines this weekend when he urinated in a grand and public fashion on a crowd of people in Washington D.C.
Steven Lipski, a proud Democratic councilman, paid money to go see a Grateful Dead tribute band, and for this crime alone Rahm Emanuel will stuff a dead fish in his mouth. But even worse, he got so hammered he thought it would be a good idea to unzip his pants and piss off a balcony, like a drunken clown.
The police did not find this funny, so they arrested him. He tried to say that he was not urinating on anyone, he had merely spilled a drink, but of course nobody believed the comical boozebag.
Jersey City politicians have a long and proud history of embarrassing public hijinks:
The current mayor Jerramiah Healy was elected in 2004, even though shortly before the election photos circulated of him "naked and passed out on his front stoop."
This same mayor was "arrested and pepper-sprayed" outside a nightclub in 2006 "after tussling with local cops."
This background information leads us to conclude that Steven Lipski is planning a mayoral run in the near future.
Jersey City Councilman Steven Lipski is No. 1 threat at Washington club [New York Daily News]
Councilman vows to quit alcohol after public urination bust [New York Daily News]