Joe Biden Seeks Affair With Michelle Obama

LOOK folks, Joe Biden knows when a dame's got the good stuff, okay? Literally. Joe's just snagged himself the #2 position in American government and guess what, yeah that's right, he's gonna convert that into some grade-A trim, real classy broads, new one each night. Got it, chump? There ya go. So who's Joey gonna make first here? Any gal he wants, just has to point, see... Ah! He'll go with her, that black one over there, Barry's better half, what's she call herself again. Michelle. Yeah, Michelle Obama, step right up, Joey Biden wants to show you some vice-presidential hubba hubba HUBBA!

So yeah apparently Joe Biden is trying to get in shape for the ladies and talked to some reporter in a hotel gym. He gave her some standard hilarious Biden Hyperbole:

Biden seemed to be trying to stay incognito with a tan New Mexico baseball cap pulled low over his brow, but your correspondent outed him with a cheery "good morning senator." He said he was trying to work off 6 pounds gained during the campaign but looked fit in black sweats and a grey Army t-shirt.

The Delaware senator raved about future first lady Michelle Obama, calling her "the most impressive person I've met in 35 years."

"I like him. I LOVE her," he said of the Obamas.

Then he called Malia Obama the best goddamn human overall he'd met in his 150 years on earth, bar none, the little brat.

 Biden's looking to shed a few pounds; loves Michelle Obama [USA Today]