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Mintie's avatar

See, if everyone just knuckled under and adhered to these asshats' version of Christianity, the mass shootings would stop because God wouldn't need to punish us anymore!

Just like when you tell teenage girls they'll burn in hell if they have sex before marriage and abstinence is the only way to not get pregnant, the actual pregnancy and STD rates just drop like crazy.

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LeighBowery'sLuxuryComedy's avatar

(psst - this one came from Robyn.. Otherwise tho, I'd say you got that right.)

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norcalOG's avatar

Hot weather coming. That means God will be fully engaged in punishing California by letting wildfires teach us heathens to refrain from our, uh, heathenness.God squads who cheer these fires still have not figured out that much destruction has occurred where the MAGAS rule, especially in the far north and NE. In addition to destroying natural beauty, the blazes often decimate small towns and counties where Trump received well above 60% of the vote.Stupid? Beyond.

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AttyInBriefs's avatar

“It can’t be false witness if I didn’t swear on a bible.”

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Wondering Woman's avatar

Exactly. The hypocrisy of this is staggering.

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Lefty Wright's avatar

That sign still doesn't top the one on I-95 near where I live. Back in the 1970s there was a billboard saying:

You are in the heart of Klan CountryWelcome to North CarolinaJoin the United Klans of America, Inc.

With what resembles a modern day chyron at the bottom of the sign saying:

Help fight integration & communism!

Along with a hooded and robed rider on a white horse carrying a burning cross. This was in Johnston County in NC. Also a source of much of the moonshine in eastern NC from the 1930s to the 1970s.

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wmpmacm's avatar

Religion kills people .Always has.

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Swampay's avatar

That sign, though. "Ask Jesus into your ass to be saved"???? Uh, ok, you do you. I do not want Jesus in my ass.

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Daniel_Oriordan's avatar

Godlessness, fatherlessness, education, and secularism are causing mass shootings? He sure gave the game away when he got to No. 3, didn't he?

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SterWonk's avatar

There is a ridiculously strong correlation between prior domestic violence, and mass shootings. That's why red-flag laws are a Good Idea™.

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Daniel_Oriordan's avatar

I worked with a guy who became born again and made a big deal of it. The first thing he did was make up a list of everyone he knew that he was now better than.

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Daniel_Oriordan's avatar

I have seen the argument that the Ten Commandments apply only to your own tribe. So, it's "Thou shalt not kill members of your own tribe."

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Daniel_Oriordan's avatar

Heaven for the climate, Hell for the company.

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SterWonk's avatar

Leonard Nimoy LIBELZ!!!

(Also too, Nimoy was Jewish.)

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Daniel_Oriordan's avatar

They're still sore about how things went down in 1865.

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Daniel_Oriordan's avatar

Unless what we need right now is pizza. Then, it would be the right person in the right place at the right time.

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