321 Comments

I was told there'd be no math!

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... Onan, you din't!

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... hmmm... seems to me the Catlicks recommended something called "the rhythm method" (as opposed to bagging the todger)... and IIRC, that had something to do with pulling out - but what do I know, church sanctioned marriage counseling was something I thankfully avoided.

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... this one sends me to my bunk, every time.

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... ooh! ooh! Let it be me - I's a expert!

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... Irony Reagan? And he was tight with the Irony Lady, right? There could be something here (I have no idea what, but there could be)... oh, wait - is this like the Moral Majority? Because, you know, they were neither either...

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... I like churches, well, the really grand cathedrals, from an architectural and artistic standpoint... but the churchies? Not so much (okay, not at all).

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... "Then you really have to stop blaming me for all the evil shit you create: I the SATAN am getting really pissed at the bum rap I've been getting."

Lucifer 4:20

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... ohgod ohgod ohgod I'm gonna convert... I'm comin' Ezekiel... wait for me Zeke!... ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!1!!11!!!....

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... know what I mean, know what I mean?

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... well now, that's just spilling seed on seed... wait a second! This loaf of Ancient Grains Bread I just bought says it contains "spelt"... is that what this means? It's all starting to make sense...

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... I remember being laughed at when I suggested that a country that elected Ronnie Raygun (a passable actor) and G.W. (a semi-literate, incurious buffoon) could very well elect Dumbald Drumpf because he combined the worst aspects of those two. Crazy, they called me. Who's crazy now? Speaking of crazy - has Ben found his luggage yet? Does he know it's been forwarded to HUD? Shhh! Don't tell him and he might not show up to work.

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... even those of us who have no desire to grab pussy know only too well how to handle our snakes. Speaking in tongues is the specialty of those who know how to cummunicate well with both pussies and snakes.

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... and, as Donnie petulantly whines... "if we have 'em, why can't we use 'em?" - yeah, this is going to end well. And by well, I mean, thank whateverfuckingdiety I'm old, and at this point I'll just be happy if the end of the world comes when I'm doing something enjoyable. For everybody else... I wish you the same.

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... you are giving them too much credit. Just because they can sound out the words, doesn't mean they understand them. (cf. Donald Drumpf)

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... only if it's not their eye for an eye, 'cause you know, that's persecution. But queer eyes for furrin guys? Git 'er done!

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