Don't Know Who Needs To Hear This, But The Sonic In Rifle, Colorado, Has A Job Opening

No really, we looked, because we are a goddamned journalist.

As of right this moment as we type this, there is no declared winner in Colorado's Third Congressional District, but the normal and human and nice Democrat named Adam Frisch leads the opposite of all that, Lauren Boebert, by 64 votes. They probably won't call it, and it will go straight to a recount. 

As a reminder, these were the candidates' closing messages:  

“average gop message vs average Dem message”

— Jeff Ettinger Memorial Stadium (@Jeff Ettinger Memorial Stadium) 1668023571 

Right. We are not ready to expend any energy on that, beyond to say that we hope Lauren Boebert gets the election result she deserves and that there is minimal interruption to her health insurance coverage.

We'll keep you posted.

Speaking of Boebert and people who might have vied for her title as the third stupidest person in the House of Representatives, we did want you to hear officially from Wonkette that Bo Hines, the 27-year-old Aryan Madison Cawthorn lookalike MAGA clown from North Carolina who wanted 10-year-old rape victims to have to go before a community board to determine if an abortion was necessary, has lost his race decisively in North Carolina's 13th to Democrat Wiley Nickel. 

 New Madison Cawthorn Stupider Than Old Madison Cawthorn, Somehow 

As data continues to come out on what has happened in the House so far, it's clear that one factor in Republicans' disappointment is that Donald Trump is a fucking electoral kiss-of-death loser who is more despised by good and normal and cool people than any human who ever lived or died, a man who will go to his grave never having received respect or adoration from the people whose approval he craves.

 The editorial this morning in the Wall Street Journal is headlined "Trump is the Republican Party's biggest loser" — all the Murdoch properties have fully turned on Trump, they are wiggling their Viagra boners at Ron DeSantis now — and it is full of data points about Trump dragging candidates down, something we examined quite a bit in Senate and governor's races yesterday. Here are a couple of places Trump fucked Republicans in the House:

[I]n Michigan, Mr. Trump helped John Gibbs beat GOP Rep. Peter Meijer in the primary in the Grand Rapids seat because Mr. Meijer voted to impeach him. Mr. Gibbs lost by 13 points. Rep. Jaime Herrera Beutler also voted to impeach Mr. Trump, who helped Joe Kent beat her in a primary. Mr. Kent is trailing in that Washington state district.

Thoughts and prayers for Joe Kent, that he might also get the result he deserves. And yes, that's the white-nationalist-adjacent dick Tulsi Gabbard has been palling around with. 

 Tulsi Gabbard Making Nice New Friends At 'Not A Democrat' School, They Are Not Even All Nazis 

What's ultimately going to happen in the House? We do not know. From what we are seeing, there is still a chance for the Democrats to hold on to it, but a lot of things would have to go the way the Lord intends. (Like Boebert losing, for example.) It could happen. But who knows?

Either way, Kevin McCarthy shouldn't have his interior designer measuring for drapes in the speaker's office, because even if he ends up with the barest of majorities, that is viewed as an embarrassing loss in MAGA world, and they are   comin' for him. (Also everybody knows Kevin McCarthy is just a really shitty leader. It's not a secret.)

Over there in the Senate, it's still up in the air, but we're seeing rumblings among the numbers folks that the Democrats might just keep both Nevada and Arizona, which would make the Georgia runoff between the very Reverend Raphael Warnock and that poor man running against him just a question of whether Democrats get an extra seat for their majority or not. The math is looking better and better for Catherine Cortez Masto in Nevada, and Blake Masters is just hot garbage, another one of those Trump fluffer candidates who sucks too hard to meet the moment.

If you would like to obsess over numbers instead of going to back to your productive daily life — it is an election week, that is fine — there is this Twitter list to keep you company.

Also this is a funny video Charlie Sykes put in his newsletter, so we will put it in our Wonkette too:

““Red wave, red tsunami.” The right wing media and MAGA Republican lawmakers get it all wrong. Enjoy. (Video: MSNBC)”

— Mike Sington (@Mike Sington) 1668074158 

[ Wall Street Journal ]

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