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Zyxomma's avatar

Ta, Evan. I'm still listening to OHJB's address to the U.N., so I'm afraid I'll have to skip this one.

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Cincinnatus's avatar

HuffPo: Trump Makes 'No Beach-Napping' Pledge In Odd Shot At Biden

"Trump has made a vow to the American public that no-one asked him to – he'll never sleep on the beach when the cameras are on him.

During an increasingly erratic speech in Georgia, the Republican candidate took aim at President Joe Biden, who had the temerity to take a nap while on vacation at Rehoboth beach in Delaware last month, well after he dropped out the race.

"Here's a guy that can sleep on the beach," Trump said, astonished. "How can you sleep on the beach when you have cameras on? I will never sleep on the beach in front of live television. I promise.""

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JCfromNC's avatar

What a weirdo.

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"M"'s avatar

"I will never sleep on the beach in front of live television. I promise."

Yeah -- he only sleeps IN COURT

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Cat Cafe's avatar

Because he'll never be on a beach, the Orange Oaf. Meanwhile, (a) it wasn't "live television," it was papparazzi, and (b) he literally slept soundly in front of live television WHILE ON TRIAL FOR FEDERAL FELONIES

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"M"'s avatar

... as well as at his own convention, IIRC

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Cat Cafe's avatar

YES

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Linda's Bitter Disappointment's avatar

WE HAVE AIR CONDITIONING!

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🍁 L Ron Pony's avatar

𝗛𝗨𝗭𝗭𝗔𝗛!!!𝟭!

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SkeptiKC's avatar

Congratulations!

That is an earnestly desired appliance hereabouts.

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Jezdukowski's avatar

Is life just basically figuring out what you're having for dinner every goddamn day until you die?

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"M"'s avatar

Only if you fail at meal planning a lot

Which I try not to do

But I struggle

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BillEGoatSmile's avatar

I spent 90 minutes at the dentist this morning. And yes, it's 2:30 and my brain is going 'what are you making for supper?'. And my mouth keeps vetoing everything I come up with.

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"M"'s avatar

Protein shakes with a lil' ice cream tonight, I hope

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Zyxomma's avatar

I too visited the dentist today, for a cleaning. When I went to pay, the practice manager, who is married to the head dentist, said it was on them -- a wedding present. They're good people.

I had to make dinner; darling husband Meccalopolis had a Zoom meeting to attend. I made vegan pasta carbonara. We had leftover Just Egg that had to be used, I bought MyBacon (bacon made from mycelium), a shallot, frozen peas, and. vegan cheese, as well as some artisanal Italian pasta. It's divine. It included some maitake from our mountain and tomato from our garden. I never had pasta carbonara in my life; I was vegan before it ever appeared in NYC. But it did sound appealing, and now I know.

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🍁 L Ron Pony's avatar

"The History of every major Galactic Civilization tends to pass through three distinct and recognizable phases, those of Survival, Inquiry and Sophistication, otherwise known as the How, Why, and Where phases. For instance, the first phase is characterized by the question 'How can we eat?' the second by the question 'Why do we eat?' and the third by the question 'Where shall we have lunch?'”

- Douglas Adams

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Trespassers Will's avatar

“You’re born. You live. You go on some diets. You die”

— Opus

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Stulexington's avatar

Pretty much.

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Bear: PROTECT THE AMERICUB's avatar

One of the air molecules that Biden expelled in saying the word "fentanyl" just brushed past a cop, and now that cop is dead from exposure to fentanyl!! Why does Biden hate our first responders!??!??!?!111

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algore lactating's avatar

stealth defend by biden.

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Hamilton & The Crew 👉NO👑S👈's avatar

It was a Fentanyl Midichlorian. You need to titrate those properly to avoid injury or death.

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Jezdukowski's avatar

One time a man saw fentanyl in a closet and the fentanyl looked at him and he died.

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Hamilton & The Crew 👉NO👑S👈's avatar

Worse: It was a picture of a fentanyl.

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Stulexington's avatar

Poor cop.

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Villago Delenda Est 🇺🇦's avatar

Well, I'm seeing a "give me a treat or two, then go to sleep, and forget you gave me a treat or two."

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🍁 L Ron Pony's avatar

The maniacs do that to me. They think I have short-term memory issues and will believe I forgot to give them their noon treats.

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Hamilton & The Crew 👉NO👑S👈's avatar

I have a strong urge to order tacos.

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SkeptiKC's avatar

Mmmm...I wish that taco places delivered around here.

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Rosy red ASS's avatar

Mmmmmmmm tacos........

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Villago Delenda Est 🇺🇦's avatar

It IS Tuesday, after all.

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Oy!'s avatar

Just say no . . . to Trump.

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SethTriggs's avatar

God he's so senile and on death's door, am I right?

I laugh so I don't cry.

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Stulexington's avatar

O we don't talk about candidate age now that Republicans have the oldest candidate ever.

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Trespassers Will's avatar

We need to throw Kamala in jail because Joe is so senile and that’s how it works now.

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Hamilton & The Crew 👉NO👑S👈's avatar

People with logical minds getting hooked on opiates is perfectly understandable.

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Villago Delenda Est 🇺🇦's avatar

Who knew that big pharma would be directly implicated in organized crime? Why, I'm feeling faint!

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Daydrinking is my JOB!'s avatar

(Hands Villago some pearls to clutch)

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Trespassers Will's avatar

Can I offer you a quick pick-me-up?

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Stulexington's avatar

Well they're quite organized.

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Hamilton & The Crew 👉NO👑S👈's avatar

And they are quite crime.

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Villago Delenda Est 🇺🇦's avatar

Belgium is worried about waffles. And sprouts.

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Stulexington's avatar

They're waffling on that one.

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Hamilton & The Crew 👉NO👑S👈's avatar

hmmmmmmhhhhH! Chocolate waffle cone, and hold the sprouts!

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🍁 L Ron Pony's avatar

Holding Chapman's Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream.

I think I may have decided on dinner.

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🍁 L Ron Pony's avatar

When you watch movies like 'Reefer Madness' or 'The Devil's Weed,' they never show the part where the drugs are being made by pharmaceutical giants and pushed by pharma reps and doctors.

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Hamilton & The Crew 👉NO👑S👈's avatar

Isn't capitalism out of control great?

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Villago Delenda Est 🇺🇦's avatar

Just heard from Italy, concerned about fentanyl in spumoni. Now the Dominican Republic reports on their fentanyl issues.

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Rhand Holm's avatar

OT observation. Things break in cars all the time. Ever heard of the car buzzer breaking? You know, the warning that your seat belt is off, the door is ajar, the emergency break is on, there is something on your back seat and the seat belt isn't engaged (my dog), your keys are in the ignition, your headlights are on.... A never ending input of idiot alerts that never seems to break.

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Pandora's avatar

The Check Engine light on my Nissan has been randomly turning on and off since 2008. Nobody can figure out why, so I keep hoping the bulb burns out.

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BillEGoatSmile's avatar

We had an old Camry back in the day that had an airbag light that was always on. Caused some grief during its last inspection. Anyhow, then I hit a deer on the Mass Pike at 70 mph. Hooray, the airbag worked! Didn't have to worry about any more inspections though.

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Donald Laporte's avatar

That's a scary accident. Glad you're OK

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Alternative Dog's avatar

As the Car Talk guys used to say, that's what black electrical tape is for.

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🍁 L Ron Pony's avatar

When I disconnected the antilock in my Fusion (I do not trust antilock) I disassembled the instrument cluster and painted over the warning light.

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Trespassers Will's avatar

My electric kettle loves to beep. It even beeps when I place it back on its element, and I’m like “I know, I just put you on there why the fuck are you beeping?”

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Rhand Holm's avatar

Microwaves that beep intermittently, beep beep beep pause beep beep beep, for eternity to let you know your popcorn is done.

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🍁 L Ron Pony's avatar

It's saying 'I love you!'

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Villago Delenda Est 🇺🇦's avatar

It's like a cat's slow blink.

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🍁 L Ron Pony's avatar

There were a few English cars back in the 80s that were notorious for the warning systems constantly going off even when nothing was wrong.

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Wojciech's avatar

i don't know if the Reliant Robin was one of those cars. but they sure were ugly AND dorky looking!

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Trespassers Will's avatar

Everything I know about the Reliant I learned from Mr. Bean.

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Wojciech's avatar

Mr. Bean, Red Dwarf, and a 1984 Tracy Ullman video!

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🍁 L Ron Pony's avatar

It wasn't. Turns out the Robin (and its four-wheeled sibling the Kitten) are practically bulletproof.

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Rhand Holm's avatar

Ah, the Vauxhall Alarmist.

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Bobathonic's avatar

Hey, Lucas is trying!

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Richard S's avatar

The one I hate is the "collision warning". Yes, I am WELL AWARE that there is a car to the left of me that IS ALSO TURNING LEFT (albeit in another lane). And I AM quickly and safely slowing down as I approach the intersection where a car is turning to the right and there's no chance of my hitting them. I do NOT need a loud beep startling me!

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🍁 L Ron Pony's avatar

Don'tcha love the car commercials showing that? Apparently there's huge numbers of drivers who are completely unaware of anything happening outside the vehicle unless something screams at them.

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Paulomatic's avatar

Lucas, Prince of Darkness.

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Villago Delenda Est 🇺🇦's avatar

The really annoying part is when they scream out "Sil Flancis Dlake has sighted the Spanish Almada!"

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Villago Delenda Est 🇺🇦's avatar

OHJB, on fentanyl."There's so much more that needs to be done"

Rethuglicans: "And we'll be there to protect the Sacklers from the consequences of their insatiable greed."

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Dusty Tomes's avatar

OHJB is entirely correct. Fentanyl is dangerous. We can do more. But not what the Republicans want, that'll just make it worse.

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🍁 L Ron Pony's avatar

I don't recall any of them telling us what they WOULD do, apart from putting even more people in jail.

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Villago Delenda Est 🇺🇦's avatar

Well, anyone but the manufacturers.

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🍁 L Ron Pony's avatar

The pushers don't commit crime, only the users do.

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YaJagoff's avatar

Sorry foy the O/T but I can't wait until the open Thread. Project 2025 mastermind allegedly told colleagues he killed a dog with a shovel. https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2024/sep/24/project-2025-kevin-roberts-killed-dog

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SethTriggs's avatar

Well, yeah. Because why wouldn't he be?

The blood libel against the Haitian immigrants was just projection all along.

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Jezdukowski's avatar

They are all ghouls. All of them. Strange how a fascist ideology seems to attract the best humans, isn't it?

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Hamilton & The Crew 👉NO👑S👈's avatar

The poor dog was just a dry run prior to killing the US.

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JanuaryClaire's avatar

"[A] neighbor’s dog had been barking pretty relentlessly and was, you know, keeping the baby and probably the parents awake and that he kind of lost it and took a shovel and killed the dog. End of problem.”

Good grief. The poor dog!!

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Aquaman, Real Estate Investor.'s avatar

Ok, that's a gigantic red flag.

Put him on the list of suspects if anyone in his family ever gets killed.

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Alternative Dog's avatar

Heaven forbid knocking on the neighbor's door to discuss the issue. Violence and death is a much easier solution.

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SethTriggs's avatar

These are the kind of people for whom guns are a remote control for life, and failing that, blunt instruments.

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Jezdukowski's avatar

"Shoot Your Way to Success!"

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🍁 L Ron Pony's avatar

I suppose we can be thankful he didn't use the shovel on the dog's owners. Though I'll bet a cookie he thought about it.

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Nuernburger's avatar

Why would one ever admit that except for some threatening reason ? That takes some brutality.

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SethTriggs's avatar

Because of Murc's Law. He's not a Democrat so there won't be any accountability for it!

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Stulexington's avatar

I'm completely surprised they're showing escalation red flags.

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Villago Delenda Est 🇺🇦's avatar

(insert classic scene from 𝘊𝘢𝘴𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘢𝘯𝘤𝘢 here)

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R. Riddle's avatar

I still believe that most current conservative politicians would be serial killers if they never went into politics. Maybe some of them are and we just don't know it.

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Jamoche's avatar

They're killers by proxy - you just know that's why they're in favor of wars.

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SethTriggs's avatar

Also why they've defanged our public health apparatus, leaving us defenseless for the next pandemic.

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Pauly2coffees's avatar

Noem: “I’d like to subscribe to your newsletter.”

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Internet Personae's avatar

Criminal charges have been filed against Donald and JDVance in Ohio by the Haitian Bridge Alliance - bwahaha -

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FdCTDouBDkQ

Subscribe to Hawk while your there - he should get more attention -

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