439 Comments
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Linoleum von Curmudgeon, Esq.'s avatar

"Now we’ll all have to find other ways of gaining superpowers, like lollygagging around nuclear test sites."

But do be mindful of adverse side effects. In my own case I have found that the change in my skin color has caused certain government agencies and private political groups to implement discriminatory policies towards me.

Fortunately my increased height, strength and durability have foiled every attempt to abridge my civill rights by puny humans.

yrs,

Dr Bruce Banner, PhD

Chairman, Atom Smashing Committee

CERN

Geneva, Switzerland

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thephantomcheese's avatar

What do you call someone who graduated last in his class in medical school?

"Doctor"

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Jessica's avatar

If everything is the Antichrist then nothing is the Antichrist

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Renaissance Outlaw's avatar

Repukes love this conspiracy spewing quack.

Joycelyn Elders talked about jerking off and they all got the vapors

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Sally Lunn's avatar

I think I might get on this bandwagon had I not read Dr.Liebers paper. Or been Dewed relentlessly since Nov.10th, 2021.

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tegrat's avatar

Getting my sixth jab tomorrow.

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heather's avatar

"COVID-19 may no longer be a pandemic, ..." (first line) - some bad news about that.

WHO leader says COVID-19 is "still a pandemic"

A World Health Organization leader says she is worried people are still too eager to move on from COVID

https://www.salon.com/2024/01/04/leader-says-19-is-still-a-pandemic/

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Phried Ω's avatar

I was feeling, so bad

I asked my family doctor just what I had

I said Doctor (Doctor)

Mr. M.D. (Doctor)

Now can you tell me what's ailing me (Doctor)

He said yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah (Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah)

Yes indeed, all I, I really need

Now gimme that good, good lovin'

(Good love) All I need is love

(Good love) Good, good lovin' baby

(Good love)

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3FingerPete's avatar

This is why I drink only distilled water and pure grain alcohol.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J67wKhddWu4

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beb's avatar

You should add some orange juice to the grain alcohol for the electrolytes and vitamin C.

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Wookiee Monster's avatar

I teach freshmen students the difference between RNA and DNA. One would think an MD would know the difference.

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Robert Eckert's avatar

He missed the day they taught medicine at medical school

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fair_n_hite_451's avatar

He was busy guzzling demon jizz on that day in medical school. And on every day in high school biology where it was covered. And likely got those questions wrong on every exam he ever wrote.

Or ... and stick with me here ... he just might be a lying grifter who doesn't believe a word that's coming out of his own mouth, but says all that bs to collect a paycheck.

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Bitter Scribe's avatar

I've said it before, I'll say it again: How the fuck has this guy kept his medical license?

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Wookiee Monster's avatar

Forget it Jake, it’s Florida.

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Parker Leo Blinsky's avatar

Florida.

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Liminal's avatar

> "You know, it’s just complete disrespect to the human genome and the importance of protecting it and preserving it. And that is our connection to God."

Respect my DNA's authoriteh!

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letinstar's avatar

I wouldn't let this quack put a band aid on my skinned knee..

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Manic Pixel Dream Girl's avatar

The “neener-neener”, fingers in ears, “I can’t hear you” approach to sound advice and logic is no way to go through life. Especially as a, you know, state surgeon general. Hope Hannity has fun in the plague-drenched, fascist state of FL.

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EyeQueue's avatar

Any public official who claims anything is "the Antichrist" needs to be laughed out of the room and not given a seat at the table with actual grown up adults.

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Katerwauler's avatar

If science can so easily fuck with god's infinitly-holy-no-take-backs-shit, your god is, uh, not so infallible there, where's Flanders with the lighter

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