Mamas Don't Let Your Babies Go To Mar-A-Lago! Tabs, Fri., Dec. 19, 2025
Morning news roundup!
Good morrow to you, gentles! It is time for tabs!
That time Marla Maples warned the mother of a 14-year-old model — in a nice way, not an “I’ll fight you” way — to keep her daughter away from the gross men of Mar-a-Lago and “especially” her husband, Donald J. Trump. And a lot lot lot lot lot more. (Archived link New York Times)
More Epstein Files photos released by the hoaxing Democrats. Parker Molloy notes on Bluesky that the New York Times’s David Brooks, who wrote that the Epstein Files were “overblown” and we should “move on,” is in them. Is that bad? (House Oversight Democrats)
Jeff Tiedrich watched Trump’s stupid primetime speech so we wouldn’t have to. (Tiedrich) Bill Kristol is relieved by Trump’s stupid primetime speech, that at least he forgot to take us to war. (And at the end of that post, Mona Charen — really? — is, like, not Islamophobic about the terrible shooting at Bondi Beach. Weird weird weird.) (The Bulwark) Dan Pfeiffer says we should pay for Trump’s travel to go campaign for the midterms, if he’s going to be as idiotic and unbelievable as he was in his stupid fucking primetime speech. (Message Box)
Three Democrats voted with the Republicans for Marjorie Taylor Greene’s bill to imprison doctors who do healthcare to trans children. It’s a bill so loathsome that Chip Roy and Dan Crenshaw tried to offer less imprisony alternatives. Impeach these motherfuckers already. (Erin in the Morning / The Fucking News)
The New York Times, in addition to doing misinformation about trans children, has moved on to misinformation about vaccines. Yikes! (Media and Democracy Project)
Resegregating America: It’s what’s for dinner! (Madiba K. Dennie at Balls and Strikes)
They’re renaming the Kennedy Center because are you fucking kidding me with this? But in the meantime, they literally muted a Black woman on the board to make it “unanimous” because of course they did. (Laura Bassett)
Be the ICE-fighter you want to see on the streets! (The Guardian) I mean fighting against these guys, obviously. They suck! (Ohio Capital Journal)
The trial of Judge Hannah Dugan started and wrapped this week. Here’s everything that happened. (All Rise News)
Portland strippers once again the top toy donor to children’s hospital. Bless you, strippers! (Good Good Good)
Here is the story of Melissa Hortman’s life. Let’s all do our best to be just as magnificent. (Rolling Stone)
For tomorrow (Saturday) evening at 9 p.m., your friend ZiggyWiggy has put together a Wonkette Movie Night Rob Reiner Tribute. Starting with This Is Spinal Tap, available for free with subscription on HBO Max and Hulu; $5.99 to rent in the usual places. Free on the Internet Archive. There will be a short 5 minute intermission between movies. We will start the second movie at 10:30 pm ET. The Princess Bride is available for free with a subscription on Disney, $14.99 to rent in the usual places, free on the Internet Archive (scroll to the last page of the list). Both movies are short (82 minutes and 98 minutes) so we should be finished with both around midnight.
All Wonkette posts are free! Send to a friend!




A spot of good news for the critically endangered Scottish wildcat, your hed gif critter: https://martiniambassador.substack.com/p/scottish-wildcats-given-a-helping
And your Friday meme chat: https://open.substack.com/chat/posts/46671492-37cc-411b-bf23-e2e637f7d77f?utm_source=share
Library of Congress highlights a charming vintage card.
https://www.instagram.com/reel/DSaD2QjEbIA/?igsh=aDlmYnVjYXh5NG5q