Marry, F*ck, Kill Your Television
Hey y'all! You been continuing to visit our sweet little sister site, HappyNiceTimePeople.com, after we murdered it with a hammer in its cute little kitten head, we mean "sold it so some sap"? No. No you have not. Let's see what this nice fellow "Rick" has wrought this week!
The National Geographic Channel is getting its Jesus on. Because ... reason?
Fox News explained to black people how to be black. That probably went really well, right?
HBO did a thing. This is not like in Salon, in its execrable and never-ending series I Did A Thing, because this might actually make some small differences in somebody's life, that difference being "getting to watch more HBO," which is pretty much an unalloyed good.
A lady got to go to Hawaii as recompense for having to watch The Bachelor, which -- The Bachelor -- is pretty much an unalloyed bad.
Rifftrax! An interview with!
Now if we can just get Rick to recap 19 Kids In My Sad Saggy Uterus, his work will be complete.
Also <a href="http:\/\/happynicetimepeople.com\/discovery-caught-telling-great-white-lies-doesnt-care\/" target="_blank">Shark Week</a> reviews on the HNTP! Spoiler; those Discovery guys are assholes.
BTW, I have married and boinked and murdered my TV many times, because that&#039;s how we slippery-sloping, moral-free, gay-marriage-supporting liberals roll. Also, too, my toaster.
Marry the refridgerator, kill the tv, and FUCK YO COUCH.