Metro Section: Kindergarten Gross Out Edition

• Fenty,fifty. Fifty states. If Fenty gives DC voting rights the whole country will fall apart and people will poop from their peeholes and pee from their poopholes. [ The DC Universe ]

• "I like being friends with my dad. I know I sound like a kindergartener when I say it, but I do." Nah, bro. You don't sound like a kindergartner, but you spell like one. [ Fictional Rockstar ]

• "Esther Phillips has has an album and a song called 'What a Diff'rence a Day Makes.' Dude, what a difference a designated driver makes! So for real... I'm slightly hungover at work right now typing this." [ Panama's Proposition ]

• OMG this is insanely disgusting. But safe for work. Commenter says: "Jesus Christ Jeff, it's gonna take about three hours of cuteoverload.com to get over this one." [ And I am Not Lying, For Real ]