Michele Bachmann Deflects a Bi-Curious Meteor, and Robert Gibbs Has Piercings!

Our dear friendERIC KLEEFELDfrom Talking Points Memo recently wrote a provocative comic-book review, complete with professional-grade scans! Well guess what Eric?SOMEONE ELSEreceived a complimentary copy ofFalse Witness: The Michele Bachmann Story,and you're not the only one who got a fancy Epson scanner for Yom Kippur fromJOSH MARSHALL....

Close your eyes and imagine the endless pleasures of aMICHELE BACHMANNcomic book. What sort of spandex costume would she wear to accentuate her womanly figure? And how would she travel about the great state of Minnesota? In a nuclear submarine? In a cart pulled by convicted homosexuals? And would Michele detonate an IED at the Lake Wobegon abortion clinic in the first or second issue? ....

Now open your eyes and think about the worst possible Michele Bachmann comic, ever. Yes, it is some sort of liberal indictment, full of "facts" and "a page of citations," like a graphic adaption of Daily Kos . And that is exactly whatFALSE WITNESS: THE MICHELE BACHMANN STORYis. When we want the cold, hard facts, we turn on the radio and listen to the Alex Jones Show. Or we read a dictionary, or the back of a cereal box, but never a comic book! And besides, everyone knows Michele Bachmann is a bible-thumping cockgobbler, you don't need to citeBARBARA TUCHMANor whatever ....

The redeeming qualities of this comic are the subtle but effective allusions toFURRIESas well asTEA BAGGERSandGOP SLAVE INTERNS. In conclusion: this comic needs more boobs ....

The scanner works great, Josh!

GROWING ON OTHER GOSSIP GRAPEVINES: Obama's Minister of PropagandaROBERT GIBBShas a tough job, because who can ever replace Bush sex actDANA PERINO? But jumpin' Jehosaphat! According to the crackerjack news anchors at MSNBC, Gibbs was quite a fuzzy man peach back in high school. He even wore a hippie liberalEARRING-- and still has a republicanPRINCE ALBERT? Scandal! No wonder young Robert was forbidden to socialize with the débutantes at cotillion.

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