Michelle Obama's Desire To Go Outside Hurts America's Feelings

As America heads swiftly toward its impending rapture date , Michelle Obama fans are wondering why our FLOTUS has not taken advantage of the opportunity to publish a "How to Make the Most of Your Ramadan Fast" diet book or, alternatively, eat some more hamburgers while no one is paying attention. Perhaps it is because our FLOTUS is too busy going on vacation, every single day of the year. Some people are upset about this apparent revelation, because shouldn't the First Lady spend more time in the confines of her residence, having luncheons and knitting? Instead, as a direct insult to the American people, First Lady Magellan Obama thinks she needs to "see the world" and "do things."

We thought maybe the whole Marie Antoinette-comparison Spain vacation thing was over, but since Michelle Obama is now off to fancy Oregon to "visit family" and burn some money, someone decided it was time to resurrect this very important news story!

First Lady Michelle Obama over the last year has spent a total of 42 days on vacation, or a little more than one out of every nine days, according to a White House Dossier analysis of her travel.

Her vacations, the cost of which are mostly borne by taxpayers, include trips to Panama City, Fla., Martha’s Vineyard, Hawaii, South Africa, Latin America, Vail, Colo., and her visit this week to her brother in Corvallis, Ore.

Mrs. Obama’s vacations began in August 2010 with a two day weekend trip to Panama City, Fla., where the Obamas stayed overnight at a Gulf of Mexico hotel in a symbolic effort to show that the Gulf area was safe for travel in the wake of the disastrous BP oil spill.

In March, Mrs. Obama travelled to Latin America for a five day trip. I’m counting two days of this as vacation, though, because she took her children and her mother along, performed some sightseeing, and went to the beach.

Obviously, if at any point Michelle Obama sees or comes within walking distance of a national monument, body of water, or enjoyable activity, this automatically turns her trip into vacation. So really, with that criteria, who is to say Michelle Obama is not on vacation all of the time , in Washington, D.C.? If she enjoys planting things in her garden, then that is probably also a vacation thing, too. [ White House Dossier ]