Move Over Bag O' Glass, This Is The Worst Child's Christmas Gift I've EVER EVER SEEN. Tabs, Wed., Dec. 13, 2023
I just quoted MY OWN clickbait? Inception. Morning news roundup!
Happy St. Lucy’s feast day to all who celebrate, which should be all of you, she’s the one who plucked out her own goldang eyeballs! I love her very much.
The magnificent actor and hilarious dude Andre Braugher has died. And you know how I know he was cool? Because he was a Wonkette subscriber and donor, and when I emailed him his thank you note and asked (four beers in and ooooof ramblingly) if he was he or just some dude who always had to answer that question, he replied, “I am that hilarious dude.” He was extremely young. (NBC News)
SER already gave you this Amanda Marcotte on the sad Hallmark movie grandmothers whose uppity lib daughters have abandoned them just so they can be safe in blue states, so here’s this one instead on Taylor Swift and cats.
Republicans want what happened to Kate Cox in Texas to settle in as the new normal. We can’t let them. (David Pepper) New Nikki Haley answer to The Kate Cox Problem just dropped. Don’t worry, she’s sure Texas and all the other states will fix this unfortunate oversight. It would be crazy not to! (Dave Weigel on Twitter)
The red state brain drain is real and it’s serious. The lead women in the story, a married couple of OB-GYNs in Oklahoma, were up against it worse than Shy and I were in Montana. We too also got the fuck out! — Timothy Noah at The New Republic
A reminder that both Texas and Florida passed very fucking weird laws that let your typical Nazi troll sue any internet moderator that removes their spam content for spam/Nazi trolling. So these nice Reddit mods thought they’d brief the Supreme Court on the types of comments they delete about the Supreme Court. (HuffPost)
They’re exhausting. I’m sorry. Erin in the Morning has been cataloging all the people caterwauling about trans children’s unfair advantage in a host of sports from darts to chess. She’s now up to competitive Irish dancing.
So now that the president of Penn has resigned, the board member who was instigating Liz Magill’s removal even before the Very Bad House Hearings is Just Asking Questions like “should Penn really exist?” and “what if we fired all the faculty and eliminated entire departments?” and “who the fuck put me, a vulture capitalist, on the board of a university anyway?” (MSN reprint of Philly Inquirer) Meanwhile, a beautifully said op-ed from the student journalists of Harvard. (Crimson) Meanwhile too, looks like Jason Furman’s wife was chasing down a Muslim student and calling her a terrorist because of her scarf, jesus christ.
“Twitter never sent any amount of meaningful traffic to any website — it was Facebook traffic that warped most digital media executives into futile aspirations of moguldom, and it’s the fast-receding tide of Google search traffic that has turned those same characters into frantic, mewling content goblins, desperately trying to force-feed AI-generated affiliate garbage into a robot that hates them.” Why journalists miss Twitter so fucking terribly, and how it became the place that all the news happened. Also yeah it sucked. It sucks way worse now. — The Verge. But it was so good. — Also The Verge
Joe Perticone asked Rep. James Comer how Joe Biden violated FARA, Comer’s latest bullshits allegation. James Comer got mad and didn’t answer the question, because it’s bullshits. Meanwhile, is today IMPEACHMENTS? Maybe! (The Bulwark)
This Gen Z comedian, Leo Reich, does sound hilarious. I could even watch his comedy special, which I have done none times in the past three decades since I stopped living with a comedian. (Comedy specials: They’re like podcasts, but on a stage!) (New Yorker)
Oooh, pretty: The stunning revival of Maine’s Penobscot River. — Reasons to Be Cheerful
Move over Bag O’ Glass, this is the worst child’s Christmas gift I have ever, ever seen. WOW! Okay but on closer look, it’s to be a social media influencer for science. I am torn. Also it’s terrible. (eBay)
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Today’s hed artist is Pieter Bruegel, the Elder. Get off his lawn!
https://open.substack.com/pub/martiniambassador/p/pieter-bruegel-the-elder
I know a lot of you will want to linger over these works that are SO PACKED with details, so I’ve provided links to every one of them in the write up. Service-y!
I have a niece that is a social media influencer, and I’m not even kidding, that is her job. Places like liquor companies send her stuff and then, I dunno, she dresses sexy and talks about them or something, I’ve never watched her output. And also her rich doctor dad still gives her an allowance, even though she’s an adult now. AND, she collects welfare from the state of CA because all that other stuff isn’t enough for her greedy ass. I’m repulsed.