10 Comments
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BarackMyWorld's avatar

So no contraception except the kind that doesn't work, but also not have a bunch of babies??? And is the church still against everything but vaginal intercourse?

Oh, I think I get it...now the church wants even married people to quit fucking.

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Spotts1701, Taking Bible Guns's avatar

Is this different coffee than we usually get? *slurps*

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Zippy W. Pinhead's avatar

<i>But God gives you methods to be responsible</i>

Yeah, like condoms and birth control pills. It's like the punchline to the old joke about the guy sitting on his rooftop as the floodwaters overwhelm him. When he drowns, he beseeches god for not helping him. God says "what do you mean no help? I sent three boats!"

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Good_Gawd_Yall - Unperson's avatar

Well, he IS the Pope, so he can't hardly say "All y'all can fuck all ya want, and it's cool with me if you don't make rugrats all the time." Much as I might actually start revising my opinion of the church upward if he did.

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Vienna Woods's avatar

Dammit, you beat me to it.

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Capt.Jim's avatar

Why dont New Pope Frank just come out and say you can fuck for fun without going to hell

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Dashboard Buddha's avatar

That's right...If Mister or Missus Catholic is already committing adultery, then asking their lover to use a Baby Blocker isn't really that much of a step closer to hell.

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𝔅𝔢𝔢𝔩𝔷𝔢𝔟𝔲𝔟𝔟𝔞's avatar

2 Thessalonians 2:10-11 for the general concept: sinners are punished by being sent further into sin.

This is the go-to bibble quotation, whenever one of the flock notices that the sinners are having all the fun: You're supposed to feel smug, knowing that the sinners, what with all the exra sinning, will get whacked extra hard on Judgement Day. (Basically, God, in his infinite mercy, is setting them up.)

So, you know how when you're in bed with your girlfriend, and her hot roommate decides join you for a threesome? According to the bibble-humpers, that's God punishing you.

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Lefty Mark's avatar

Pope Lepus I

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Lefty Mark's avatar

We need a Pope who is not a Bibble Thumper.

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