10 Comments
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PsycWench's avatar

The same one used to drive the hussy out of camp.

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Dashboard Buddha's avatar

Only Newt would view getting laid for the first time in a year and a half after being in prison as an "unmitigated disaster".

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Dashboard Buddha's avatar

We were raving lunatics crazed by hunger, wood alcohol and the leavings from rum distillery...and we LIKED IT!

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Dashboard Buddha's avatar

Sadly, this will appear in the Texas history books....the Brits were routed by a 1970 Dodge Charger.

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TundraGrifter's avatar

That is some fowl writtin'.

Any scrivener who pens "unmitigated disaster" knows that "hussy" is always preceded by "brazen."

Meanwhile, of course Gen. Lee was in "his" cups. Whose cups should he be in? Did they even have jock straps back then?

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Dashboard Buddha's avatar

My car's name is Specific Lee

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Bourgeois Nerd's avatar

Didn't Martha Washington become a tireless advocate for the veterans of the Continental Army who had a terrible time getting the pensions they were promised out of the government? Those goddamn socialists!

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Dashboard Buddha's avatar

And Martha was the revolutionary war version of Snooki?

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PsycWench's avatar

This is why we know General Lee as the Father of Four Loko.

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Dashboard Buddha's avatar

No offense? Well then, take a bath you stinky cheese eater. Oh, btw...Newt sucks, also.

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