Lately God has been shooting firestorms at the wingnuts in the American South like a furious undersexed teenager holding a paintball gun, something that has left wingnuts a little confused. Republican governors are the most mystified of all about this turn of events, because they are being asked to show something called "leadership in times of crisis," which they have always put in the "God's job" column of their state task lists. Republicans handle election campaigns and tax cuts and Kochsucking, that is what is on their list. But to make this clearer, Oklahoma governor Mary Fallin is the latest GOP governor to join Rick Perry in formally asking God "what the hell?" Fallin has a
If you think that's hard, try dealing with Eric Cantor! The guy was a total douche when we were negotiating the sale of his soul. Two words for you, Eric: special place.
Asians pray for longer hours, with fewer benefits, than Americans do. Ever since God lowered His international prayer barriers, it's been hard to compete.
They just fall back on the fool-proof "God's will" non-explaining explain-all explanation.
We just had an 8-year-old kidnapped, killed, and chopped to pieces in Brooklyn. NYT quoted some Hassidic guy, who said that "God wanted it to happen."
Your prayer is important to us. Please begin praying at the tone. [BEEEP]
Oh yeah - it's a 900 number.
PAY NO ATTENTION to the man behind the curtain!
"Render unto Ceasar, yadda yadda."
Of course, the frickin&#039; baggers don&#039;t want to do <i>that</i>, either...
Yeah, right ... that&#039;s what he told Mary.
Is that like the &quot;don&#039;t touch me there&quot; place? Cuz Cantor seems to have a LOT of experience w/ that.
ANY sex partners (*sob*)
Silly me, all I&#039;ve been praying for is a jerb.
Wow ... I&#039;m sure that took all of His attention and energy. No wonder He&#039;s not taking calls from Perry and Failin&#039;.
Pretty close, HC ... but there is no manager. I just stand there snorting, and go back out when I can keep a straight face on.
Then we send rain until the Mississippi goes 20 feet over its banks, for the lulz.
If you get only one or the other ... that&#039;s a tough choice.
If you think that&#039;s hard, try dealing with Eric Cantor! The guy was a total douche when we were negotiating the sale of his soul. Two words for you, Eric: special place.
Uh-oh ... tweeted &#039;em to the wrong address, did you?
Asians pray for longer hours, with fewer benefits, than Americans do. Ever since God lowered His international prayer barriers, it&#039;s been hard to compete.
They just fall back on the fool-proof &quot;God&#039;s will&quot; non-explaining explain-all explanation.
We just had an 8-year-old kidnapped, killed, and chopped to pieces in Brooklyn. NYT quoted some Hassidic guy, who said that &quot;God wanted it to happen.&quot;
That&#039;s some God you got there, fella.
40 days ought to do it...
Mostly you have to use the dull end ... and swing it.