Old Handsome Joe Biden Makes Gay Weddings Great Again

Let's start our Wednesday morning with a happy nice time story, and who better to make that happen than Old Handsome Joe Biden? Monday afternoon, Biden tweeted out a picture of himself doing some gay marriage to some gaymosexuals he met at the 7-11:

Haha, fooled you, he did not marry gays from the 7-11, that was just Wonkette saying an entertaining joke! So Joe and Brian, they are White House staffers. We bet they flirted a whole bunch of times and then finally sealed the deal in the Lincoln Bedroom, or maybe in the Rose Garden, you know gays and how they sex each other. Let's see what a responsible news organization has to say about this:

Biden officiated over the wedding of two longtime White House staffers, Brian Mosteller and Joe Mahshie, at the Naval Observatory on Monday, his office said. [...]

His office said the vice president obtained a temporary certification from the District of Columbia to preside over the wedding ceremony, which was attended only by the grooms' families.

Biden's wife, Jill, later tweeted: "Love is love!"

Awwww, JILL!

[wonkbar]<a href="https: //wonkette.substack.com/p/afternoon-nicest-time-the-time-young-handsome-joe-biden-fell-in-love-with-gay-marriage"></a>[/wonkbar]ABC notes that Old Handsome Joe became officially gay for gay marriage in 2012, but does everybody remember that amazing story he told at the Freedom To Marry victory celebration last year, about when he REALLY fell in love with the idea that love is love? We told you it over a year ago!

Let's relive that speech, yeah?

This has been a heroic battle, but it has been based on a very simple proposition best expressed at least to me by my dad when I was a 17-year-old kid. My dad was one of those — as the Irish say, the highest compliment you give someone is he was a good man. My dad was a good and decent man.

And I was — I learned early on I didn’t like digging ditches in the summer with construction crews so I became a lifeguard. (Laughter.) But they paid a lot more money. I was in a county system, in a county pool. And they paid more money in the city. And so my dad on the way to his job in the morning, and this — if you know anything about — you probably don’t — my city of Wilmington, there’s a place called Rodney Square. And the buildings surrounding Rodney Square were the DuPont Company; the Hercules Corporation, which was big then; and ICI Americas, and so there were a lot of plain grey suits. And an awful lot of — at 8: 00 in the morning, an awful lot of men and women hustling off to work.

But the courthouse is in that square. And my dad pulled up to let me run out and get an application for this job in the city, and then I was going to drive him to work and drive myself home.

And as we were stopped at the light, two men on the right — very well-dressed men, obviously, business people working for either Hercules or DuPont turned and embraced one another and kissed each other. And they went their separate ways.

I’ll never forget. I turned and looked at my dad, just looked at him. And I’ll never forget what he said. He said, Joey, they love each other. It’s simple. (Applause.) They love each other. It’s simple.

STILL AMAZING. As we reported at the time, that story, according to math, must have happened in like 1959 or so, before even Stonewall happened!

Since we are remembering olden timey Joe Biden things, we should also once again gazeth upon that fine-ass picture of Joe Biden back when he was gay-marryin' age, had he been into that sort of thing, not that there would have been anything wrong with that:

In our bunks we will ever be.

BE STILL OUR HEARTS, and a hearty Wonket congratulations to Brian and Joe in their big, gay, Joe Biden-sanctified marriage, AMEN.

[ ABC ]