Orientation Week

Your mission today: look through all five hundred "new congress gets acquainted with the Capitol" stories printed today in every major paper in the country ( 1 , 2 , 3 , 4 ), and pick out the most idiotic/inane/funny-out-of-context quotes.

 Howard Mortman casts his vote for a bit of wide-eyed wonder at gift regulations and shopping opportunities, but we're going to go with new BFF Jesus Freak Michele Bachmann's "joke: "

"My No. 1 goal is to not go to jail," Bachmann said, chuckling.

You'll have to bring your A Game to compete with crazies past, Michele, but we have hope for you.

 Newcomers Prepare for the 110th Congress [Star Tribune]