Pardon Me, Are You Ready To Celebrate National Mustard Day?
Top tier condiment.
Happy weekend!
Today is National Mustard Day, and while I believe that most of these fake holidays are stupid, I am always down to celebrate my favorite condiments — and mustard is a pretty good one.
As such, your first present this weekend is the old Grey Poupon commercial, which is even more insane than I remembered.
I mean, who leaves home without their jar of mustard, amirite?
And who among us can forget the single greatest scandal of the Obama presidency? No, not the time he wore a tan suit, or the time he wore a helmet while riding a bike — the time he asked for dijon mustard on a hamburger. Like some kind of … fancy man who likes fancy mustard, or something.
And because we learned yesterday that the Corporation for Public Broadcasting has officially been murdered by the Republicans, allow me to present you with Mr. Rogers singing “What Do You Do With The Mad That You Feel?” which, you may be aware, he recited to Congress when imploring them to keep funding the CPB.
I actually just started actually weeping while listening to that, so I think it is now time for me to go, I hope you all have a lovely Mustard Day!
Have you been struck with a sudden urge to shower us with money and jewels? If so, we are on Substack now so you can just go ahead and click subscribe! Click click click!!
Or if you’d just like to donate just once …
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Wonkette
PO Box 38273
Detroit MI 48238
Talk amongst yourselves!
Open Thread Chat Aug. 2 Caturday! Cats who saved the day! https://moderncat.com/articles/hero-cats/
The cat she named Homer (after the blind Greek poet) had a zest for life undiminished by his handicap. He loved plucking rubber bands and pounced unerringly on buzzing flies. Homer’s blindness made him brave. “He never knew how much smaller he was than other cats—he would always stand up to them,” says Gwen. Homer’s courage saved his owner’s life. In the summer of 2000, Gwen was jolted awake by Homer’s growls. Turning on her bedside lamp, she saw a strange young man hovering over her bed. “I was instantly terrified,” she recalls. She tried to dial an emergency number, but the intruder told her “Don’t do that.”
Sensing her fear, Homer launched himself at the burglar, who turned tail and fled. Homer’s fearlessness rubbed off on his owner. “The biggest thing I got from Homer is that sometimes…you just have to take a blind leap.” In 2004 she took a chance on dating her best friend, though she feared losing him if the relationship failed. Today they’re happily married.
She also embarked on a writing career, which was cemented by the publication of Homer’s Odyssey, a memoir about her life with the cat. Gwen earmarked 10 percent of the bestseller’s royalties to support organizations serving disabled animals. My Life in a Cat House, about all her favorite felines, is her latest book.
CHAT:
https://substack.com/chat/1783367/post/41e145e8-4550-4c71-b2e3-831df3d65dcd
Wonkette, where you can have a nice, long, sane conversation about mustard.