22 Comments
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Lefty Mark's avatar

Apparently Robertson's God is a total dooosh.

Gherkins d'Resistance's avatar

Shouldn't God be a little concerned about all the other important things that need his attention, like making sure some sportsball teams win, and some lose?

Gherkins d'Resistance's avatar

So God is so powerful that his holy message of "Global Warming Doesn't Exist" is completely undone if you reschedule your discussions about it during the day.

Gherkins d'Resistance's avatar

To really prove there is no Global Warming, God could theoretically do something more effective, like make the planet stop getting warmer. But I guess playing a little prank on one political party is probably a lot more effective.

Gherkins d'Resistance's avatar

*Turns on generator*

WHERE'S YOUR GOD NOW, PAT ROBERTSON?!

Msgr MΩment classic ☑️'s avatar

You didn't ask her why <i>she</i> didn't stop it? Missed opportunities, dude.

Msgr MΩment classic ☑️'s avatar

Don't do it! Flava Flav's used that tub.

Msgr MΩment classic ☑️'s avatar

Silly. What happened in Gomorrah stayed in Gomorrah.

𝔅𝔢𝔢𝔩𝔷𝔢𝔟𝔲𝔟𝔟𝔞's avatar

Ignorant rightwing fuckwits . . . wachagonnadoo?

Maybe we can sell them on the notion that God is changing the climate? Evidently, any stupid reason is reason enough for God; we just need to make it convincing.

God wants them to drive 50 miles to Wal-Mart in humongous SUVs at 80 mph (and live in McMansions, in scorching climates, with the A/C set to 65°), so we'd still have some work to do, but it might be a step in the right (haha) direction.

𝔅𝔢𝔢𝔩𝔷𝔢𝔟𝔲𝔟𝔟𝔞's avatar

There are more planets in the universe (by a factor of a zillion) than there are days in 14 billion years, so Pat's Sky-God is a busy prankster. Oh wait - it's only 6,000 years? That's 2.2 million days . . . Sky-God's gonna be very, very busy just pranking on the Milky Way. Maybe He contracts out the work on the other 100,000,000,000 galaxies.

Xtards suck at math.

BeachLoafer's avatar

How the fuck could he be stupider than Ashton Kutcher??? I've got hammers smarter than him!

Incoming Ham's avatar

He must be referring to his Own Personal Jesus.

BarackMyWorld's avatar

Yet, strangley, couldn't be bothered to stop slavery or the Holocaust.

The Quirk's avatar

Well, that's clearly an act of Satan.