22 Comments
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Lefty Mark's avatar

Apparently Robertson's God is a total dooosh.

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Gherkins d'Resistance's avatar

Shouldn't God be a little concerned about all the other important things that need his attention, like making sure some sportsball teams win, and some lose?

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Gherkins d'Resistance's avatar

So God is so powerful that his holy message of "Global Warming Doesn't Exist" is completely undone if you reschedule your discussions about it during the day.

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Gherkins d'Resistance's avatar

To really prove there is no Global Warming, God could theoretically do something more effective, like make the planet stop getting warmer. But I guess playing a little prank on one political party is probably a lot more effective.

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Gherkins d'Resistance's avatar

*Turns on generator*

WHERE'S YOUR GOD NOW, PAT ROBERTSON?!

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Msgr MΩment classic ☑️'s avatar

You didn't ask her why <i>she</i> didn't stop it? Missed opportunities, dude.

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Msgr MΩment classic ☑️'s avatar

Don't do it! Flava Flav's used that tub.

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Chris Grrr's avatar

Pure win.

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Msgr MΩment classic ☑️'s avatar

Silly. What happened in Gomorrah stayed in Gomorrah.

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𝔅𝔢𝔢𝔩𝔷𝔢𝔟𝔲𝔟𝔟𝔞's avatar

Ignorant rightwing fuckwits . . . wachagonnadoo?

Maybe we can sell them on the notion that God is changing the climate? Evidently, any stupid reason is reason enough for God; we just need to make it convincing.

God wants them to drive 50 miles to Wal-Mart in humongous SUVs at 80 mph (and live in McMansions, in scorching climates, with the A/C set to 65°), so we'd still have some work to do, but it might be a step in the right (haha) direction.

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𝔅𝔢𝔢𝔩𝔷𝔢𝔟𝔲𝔟𝔟𝔞's avatar

There are more planets in the universe (by a factor of a zillion) than there are days in 14 billion years, so Pat's Sky-God is a busy prankster. Oh wait - it's only 6,000 years? That's 2.2 million days . . . Sky-God's gonna be very, very busy just pranking on the Milky Way. Maybe He contracts out the work on the other 100,000,000,000 galaxies.

Xtards suck at math.

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𝔅𝔢𝔢𝔩𝔷𝔢𝔟𝔲𝔟𝔟𝔞's avatar

Got the receipt around here somewhere...

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BeachLoafer's avatar

How the fuck could he be stupider than Ashton Kutcher??? I've got hammers smarter than him!

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Incoming Ham's avatar

He must be referring to his Own Personal Jesus.

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BarackMyWorld's avatar

Yet, strangley, couldn't be bothered to stop slavery or the Holocaust.

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The Quirk's avatar

Well, that's clearly an act of Satan.

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