(PSSST *Grandma* Wonkette's Pineapple Orange Cranberry Sauce Is Better, Actually)
Sorry Ken Layne, don't love you no more.
THIS IS A RERUN. YOU WILL LIKE IT.
For years now — seven at least, suckers — we have been making Aunt Wonkette's Real Cranberry Business. It's great! (Needs more sugar. Not Oprah-level four damn cups, but one would be nice.) But last year, we did not do that. We wanted pineapple, which we almost always have on hand ever since your comrade Vegan & Peeara or whatever she is named these days told us while we visited her in Charleston that pineapples are symbols of hospitality.
So fuck it, we did it live!
First: Do whatever Ken says. Buy two pounds of fresh cranberries! Wash your hands, smoke a joint, pet the dog, wash your hands again, rinse the cranberries and look for pirate teeth. If you make this the night before (or even two or three nights!) you will not have to fight for oven space, but you could do that too on the day, it's fine! Preheat oven to 375, 400, it's all cool. #cookingwithrebecca #dowhatever!
Happy Thanksgiving, loves. See you on the flip!
My wife likes my cranberry sauce so much she has me make it whenever cranberries are available.Into a saucepan drop:I lb cranberries, I cup orange juice, 1 cup sugar, zest of one orange.Cook over medium heat, (use a potato masher to smash the berries,) until boiling and thickened.Add 1 Tbls or more chopped candied ginger.
Pour into a serving bowl.Stir in a snack size container of pears, drained.Cool and serve.
My dear departed sisters cranberry relish is totally the best. Not remotely sorry.Can o' whole cranberry or two cans if you want to make a vatHandful of crushed walnuts or pecans or both or leave them out if allergic but the crunch is fabulousIf you can find em a few kumquats peeled with a big long drizzle of honey and put in the blender until mulched into tiny shredsA ripe navel orange with some of the zest grated - to your taste - I use about a tablespoon per canThrow the sectioned orange into the already used blender and chopDice a bunch of celery with the tender leaf thrown in adding more crunchRefrigerate the leftovers and use on sandwiches with a dollop of mayo and leaf lettuce