Rahm Emanuel Has Been Locked In His Bedroom, Sobbing, For 24 Hours

Today is the best day of Rahm Emanuel's life. Okay, maybe a close second, behind that  loooooong dayhe spent with Tim Shriver at the White House honing his sensitivity skills. But today, man, just look at how those media suckers are eating up his story about being so "livid" that he won't even return calls to the Ricketts family, the Cubs owners whose patriarch, Joe, was going to run all of those hilarious Jeremy Wright ads. Please. He's acting. He's "livid" 100% of the time, and he's constitutionally incapable of putting his phone down. But the Ricketts are scared like the dickens after hearing this, so the plan worked: pretend to be volcanically upset at them -- as if some old coot running a couple of wingnut ads would actually offend Rahm Emanuel -- and then (a) watch a few other rich old idiots drop their own half-assed Super PAC plans, in fear, and (b) secure a better deal for renovations to Wrigley Field. Yeah, sure, it's totally inappropriate to publicly threaten to blow up a public financing deal because of a heat-of-the-moment personal grudge. But doesn't that just make it more exciting?

Maybe some of you Illinois Wonketters can help us understand how this Wrigley Field renovation is politically viable. The Illinois state government has, what, four total dollars, and Chicago has money but gives it all to the megabank consortium that runs the parking meters, and everyone is unemployed and pensionless... but the Cubs are going to secure $100 million in public financing to spruce up their stadium for their rich fans? Sounds about right, actually. Anyway, Rahm Emanuel is pretending to be so, so mad at these Cubs owners, who are now in full scramble mode. The Madman Theory, it's always fun:

The Cubs desperately need Emanuel’s support as they attempt to get city and state help for a planned $300 million renovation of Wrigley Field.

“The Mayor was livid when he read that the Ricketts were going to launch a $10 million campaign against President Obama — with the type of racially motivated ads that are insulting to the president and the presidential campaign,” an Emanuel aide said. “He is also livid with their blatant hypocrisy.”

While Tom Ricketts issued a statement distancing himself from the plan — and reached out to Emanuel Thursday morning to tell him so — the aide said Emanuel won’t talk to him.

“The Ricketts[es] have tried to contact the mayor but he’s said that he does not want to talk with them today, tomorrow or anytime soon,” the aide said.

And so it was on May 17, 2012, that Rahm Emanuel made the Ricketts family his bitch for life:

The Cubs were hoping for a vote on a state borrowing plan to bankroll the Wrigley renovation using tax-exempt bonds during the final two weeks of the Illinois General Assembly’s spring session, paving the way for construction to begin in October. The team needs the mayor’s support, because the bonds would be retired by new advertising, sponsorship and concession revenues at Wrigley and a variation of the financing scheme that Emanuel once called a “non-starter” — forfeiting 35 years’ worth of amusement tax growth.

Before the Joe Ricketts controversy erupted this week, talks with Emanuel were continuing with a “sense of urgency” to accommodate the Cubs construction timetable, City Hall sources said.

Asked Thursday whether the proposed attack on Obama would derail a deal, Emanuel said, “I’ll have some conversations on that later — comments, rather.”

He is cackling, on his fainting couch.

[ Sun Times ]