Read His Crazy Lips

Already famous for catching all the terrorists who drive taxis by day and kill by night, hilariously pretending his employees are illegal aliens,taking massive bribes from Jack Abramoff and cold hatin' on firefighters, Crazy Conrad Burns is finally in trouble for something related to his actual job in the Senate.

"I've never voted for a tax increase," Burns has repeatedly claimed. But according to something called the bipartisan Joint Committee on Taxation -- and helpfully highlighted by Jon Tester's campaign -- Conrad actually voted for "570 increases in taxes and fees totaling more than $450 billion."

But they were all little things that only hurt people who work for a living, so it's not like he was voting for new taxes for corporations or the rich. In other words, Burns is so screwed that Bush and Cheney are coming to Montana this week to scare the bejesus out of bummed-out conservatives.

 Bush, Cheney will stump for Burns [Jackson Hole Star Tribune]

 Never Say "Never" Again (PDF) [Tester For Senate]