Exciting anonymously-sourced rumors have it that lunatic prince Rick Santorum's staffers are beginning to wander out from the confines of his inmate-ruled insane asylum! Consider this your safety advisory: "One top Republican strategist said he’d seen a surge of postings on Republican job boards from Santorum staffers, and two mid-level staffers told The Hill that top aides had gone radio silent." Oh dear. But the poor, unhappy nuts do not like running around on the loose! Just listen to this one sad staffer who, uh, complained to a reporter that he feels very confused about what to do with his penis right now without Rick Santorum to give him an instruction:
"Well, it got so that every piss-ant prairie punk who thought he could say 'penis' would ride into town to try out the Wanko Kid. I must have penis-joked more men than Cecil B. DeMille. It got pretty gritty. I started to hear the word 'dingus' in my sleep. Then one day, I was just walking down the street when I heard a voice behind me say, "Reach for it, mister!" I spun around... and there I was, face to face with a six-year old kid. Well, I just threw my rat dicks down and walked away. Little bastard assfucked me in the ass (because Wonkette). So I limped to the nearest mommy blog, crawled inside a whiskey bottle... and I've been there ever since. "
He's taking 4 days off for Easter. If he manages to push the rock out and leave his tomb we'll see him lose in Pennsylvania and disappear thereafter, only to become a myth to his followers.
Seems to me you lived your life Like a dick in the wind. Never knowin' who to cling to When the Santorum came in.
And if he sees his shadow, we'll have six more weeks of campaigning!
Seems to me Rick lives his life Like a dick in the wind. Never knowin' what to cling to When the froth came in.
i would pay serious money for this.
yeah, but she's a hell of a lot prettier now, so it won't be as much fun.
plus she probably doesn't dress like the doll anymore. so there's that.
to be fair, i'd be pretty pissed if i had been abandoned in pennsylvania.
"Well, it got so that every piss-ant prairie punk who thought he could say 'penis' would ride into town to try out the Wanko Kid. I must have penis-joked more men than Cecil B. DeMille. It got pretty gritty. I started to hear the word 'dingus' in my sleep. Then one day, I was just walking down the street when I heard a voice behind me say, "Reach for it, mister!" I spun around... and there I was, face to face with a six-year old kid. Well, I just threw my rat dicks down and walked away. Little bastard assfucked me in the ass (because Wonkette). So I limped to the nearest mommy blog, crawled inside a whiskey bottle... and I've been there ever since. "
Go pray the gay away you disorganized sack of shit.
He graaaabs his dick only for a moment then the moment's gone
martyrgasm! A new word for my Derisive Dictionary.
He's taking 4 days off for Easter. If he manages to push the rock out and leave his tomb we'll see him lose in Pennsylvania and disappear thereafter, only to become a myth to his followers.
Or the porn version of Robinson Crusoe
Rick Santorum does not feel shame. Rick Santorum <i>is</i> shame.
So is Rick going to get, ahem,<i> behind</i> Mitt now?
I don&#039;t need to see &quot;surge&quot; and &quot;Santorum&quot; in the same sentence this early in the a.m.