274 Comments
User's avatar
Thomas B.'s avatar

Not a big Mouse fan, but oh lawd, please, PLEASE I'd like to see just how much petroleum jelly it takes to make those big mouse ears fit in a small orifice....legally speaking, of course.

Johnny Appleseed's avatar

"No one has made Disney more money recently than me"? Not only were they raking it in well before you got out of diapers, you need to step out of the Goofy costume every now and then. That would be the ONLY way you're making Disney more money. GFC, he's almost as stupid as Trump.

Spleen Victoria's avatar

Never thought I’d cheer for Disney but here we are.

See, the saying “You can’t fight city hall” (or in this case the state) is because usually government has so many lawyers on staff and near unlimited funds to fight something. They can also make laws to control the situation. But there are exceptions to this and one of those is a huge multinational corporate entity. They also have unlimited money and lawyers on staff and, In this case, the ability to make laws to control the situation.

I guess what I’m saying is bwahahahahaahhaahhah! I peed myself a little bit, Puddin’ Ron!

Brianna Amore's avatar

All the political acumen of a banana slug.

Sgt JMK's avatar

And about the same charisma.

Tessie's avatar

And he kinda looks like one, too.

Tosca's avatar

"Asked why he doesn’t just call Disney CEO Bob Iger to iron out an agreement..."

As if Iger would take his call.

Johnny Appleseed's avatar

If Iger ever took his call, he could be like Gilbert Gottfried in Beverly Hills Cop when Eddie Murphy was shaking him down over his ex-wife's parking tickets and picked up the phone and said "No. No. No. Bitch!", then slam the phone down on this crybaby Rhonda Santis.

Marla's avatar

DeSatan just doesn't have it in him to be a gracious loser. When he loses the Republican primary (and he will lose) I hope anything throwable within his Pudding Fingers reach is reliably nailed down.

Wookiee Monster's avatar

Look, I know I caused the accident that left your client in a wheelchair but I’ve moved on. So, if you could just drop your lawsuit and accept my settlement offer of zero dollars, we can put this all behind us.

Johnny Appleseed's avatar

Thanks for the laugh. And a perfect analogy!

zb23's avatar

if it wasn't for me your client wouldn't even have had the opportunity to get that cool wheelchair!

mr_snarky's avatar

Ronnie thinks he can just shred a contract...Mickey says "Ahem...Summon the highly paid lawyer army!"

Mexfiles's avatar

Something bothers me beyond just DeSantas' unsuitability for... well, living among humans. The suit presumes Disney is a person with first amendment rights. Yeah.. I know... "Corporations are persons, my friend"... which is obscene. Secondly, why does a corporation, whether it's a person or just a fiscal entity, given the "special rights" to control a good chunk of real estate and communities without the consent of the governed?

BlueSpot's avatar

A corporation being a "person" under the law is a concept that was well established in the English common law before the founding of the United States. Corporations are also the reason we have marriage contracts.

Edgar Allen Shmoe's avatar

Why does anyone take Ron Desantis seriously?

peteywheatstrawjr's avatar

Well, they started out taking what their preacher told them on Sundays seriously, then they took Ronald Reagan seriously, then they took Trump seriously, and now here we are.

clairence's avatar

DeSantis said "Disney needs to 'go back to what you did well,'" because we all know government officials should be dictating business strategy

Axomamma's avatar

No, no, it's not "government officials," it's "REPUBLICAN government officials." Democrats are not allowed to "pick winners and losers."

clairence's avatar

You make a good point

Mexfiles's avatar

I donno... are corporations "people" with rights, or is a corporation just a fiscal entity created by (and thus regulated) by the state? Not that Disney is doing anything illegal, and their policies are relatively enlightened.

OrdinaryJoe's avatar

THE BEATINGS WILL CONTINUE UNTIL MORALE IMPROVES!

Rat DeSantis

SunMoonStars's avatar

Fuck DeSatan, GQP and rwnjs everywhere.

el duderino's avatar

*Black Knight voice* “Alright, we’ll call it a draw”

Tessie's avatar

"But I’m not fine with giving extraordinary privileges, you know, to one special company at the exclusion of everybody else.”

Yeah, see, here's the deal with that.

Reedy Creek (the Disney organization) didn't have "extraordinary privileges"; what they had was extraordinary EXPENSES. They were paying for things like water, lights, and street cleanup out of their organization's budget.

Now that they are being "treated like everybody else", they will actually be paying LESS, and those expenses will be offloaded to the neighboring counties.

Johnny Appleseed's avatar

Oh, now you've done it. You've inserted LOGIC into the conversation. That's gonna fck em up bigly!

Marla's avatar

Reedy Creek isn't the only one of these Special Business Districts in Florida. There are over 1800 of them. When DeSatan goes after all the others, then maybe people will take him seriously. Until then, nah.

insert_something_creative's avatar

Ding ding ding!

I wonder how many people in Florida, and especially in those neighboring counties, understand that.

Tessie's avatar

"They’re going to lose that lawsuit. So what I would say is, drop the lawsuit."

This isn't even INTERNALLY consistent. If someone were suing me, and I sincerely believed that they'd lose and I'd win, I'd encourage them to go forward.