Rudy Giuliani Loves, Hates & Is The Mafia
His cousins, uncle and even his own father were all mafioso, which maybe explains why the self-hating Giuliani dedicated so much of his professional life to crushing the Family Business by prosecuting such beloved mob figures as "Fat Tony" Salerno. At the same time, his perverse obsession with dressing up as fictional characters (usually women) means he also loves acting like characters from fictional mob movies such as "The Godfather." But enough about Rudy's 1,700 mental problems; let's review his own family's life of crime:
* "Uncle Leo D'Avanzo ran a loan-sharking and gambling operation out of a Brooklyn bar, and used [Rudy's] father Harold as muscle to collect unpaid debts."
* Harold Giuliani used a baseball bat when working as an "enforcer."
* Harold Giuliani even served 18 months at Sing Sing Prison for robbing an innocent milkman, at gunpoint.
* Uncle Leo and Harold were even in a Puzo-esque shootout in Brooklyn, in the '60s.
* This had something to do with one of their mafia loan-shark businesses.
* Cousin Lewis D'Avanzo ran some major car-theft ring.
* Lewis "went to school with Giuliani and attended the mayor's first wedding."
* Also, according to the FBI, Lewis "was involved in several murders."
* Lewis "was killed in Brooklyn by FBI agents in 1977 when he tried to run down an agent who had stopped him on a warrant for transporting 100 stolen luxury cars."
* Giuliani's BFF, Bernard Kerik, is a mobster. Rudy loves Bernie so much that Bernie almost became the Secretary of Homeland Security -- an actual mobster running DHS! Instead, we have boring corporate mobsters running DHS and every other department of the Government. Vote Rudy, and he will install comical mafioso in all the neo-con positions.
* He loves the Godfather movies so much -- but probably not the third one, because he may be a sociopath but he's not an idiot -- that he always imitates Don Corleone, even when doing campaign speeches.
* All of his campaign chairmen run huge cocaine operations.