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Seeing Double: A "Special" Message "from" "Jenna and Barbara Bush"

The twins haven't been especially reliable in keeping up our correspondence, so you can imagine our delight yesterday, when we received a long-awaited email from them. We hadn't heard from them since Christmas, which is fine, because that's apparently the last time someone took a picture of the two of them in which they were neither dressed in ball gowns nor horizontal. And this wasn't just any email: It was a "special message from Jenna and Barbara Bush." Sure, if by "special" you mean stump-speech pablum, if by "from" you mean put their names on it, and if by "Jenna and Barbara Bush" you mean "Ken Mehlmann." Wait, that's not fair. . . of course Ken Mehlmann didn't write that email. Some assistant of his did. The campaign has as much as admitted this, telling Lloyd Grove that while the girls didn't necessarily write the letter, "the language is largely their own." Huh. What language exactly, you think? We're guessing the words "parties" and maybe "big." Certainly not "integrity."
Full text of the special message after the jump.
 The briefing [NYDN]
We're sure that you have no doubt who we'll be voting for in November. But you should also know that we would be voting for our Dad in this election even if he had not raised us, loved us, tutored us, coached us, and even listened to a few excuses from us for late curfews. We have been privileged to know our President personally and we know he is the right person to lead our country - especially when there are so many important issues at stake.
Our Dad has qualities that are needed in a good President - loyalty, humor (embarrassing as it sometimes may be), compassion, and, most importantly, integrity. We're not the only ones who see it. In fact, our friends - from varying political backgrounds - are supporting our Dad in November. Not only because of his decisions to liberate the women of Afghanistan or bring freedom to the people of Iraq, but because during the last ten years they met a man whose title was Governor or President, but who was always happy to be known as "our Dad." He made everyone feel welcome and comfortable in our house (except for the occasional boyfriend) and our friends got to know him as a really good guy.
We know that when you get to know his record as President, you too will feel compelled to participate in this year's election - and hopefully get involved in the campaign, too. We know it can be hard to find time to think about politics. We just graduated from college and are perfectly aware that schoolwork, parties, and extra-curricular activities keep students busy, away from campaigns and voting booths. In the last election, less than half of 18- to 24-year-olds were registered to vote, and only 32% of them actually did vote. Sadly, many Americans our age did not take advantage of their right to vote.
We are asking you to get involved with this campaign not only because it is the most critical election of our lifetime, but also because we have the ability to positively change our future. Please encourage your friends to sign up on the campaign's web site (www.GeorgeWBush.com) and register to vote online. At the web site you'll also find a lot of information about how to get involved in our Dad's re-election campaign. It's an easy process, and it's the best way to have a say in this year's election.
Thanks for taking a few minutes to think about some big issues. This is a really important election, and we know that with your help our Dad will win in November.
[Here there are two signatures. What attention to detail!]
Jenna and Barbara Bush