SEPTEMBER SURPRISE! Trump Still About As Popular As Cat Vomit

Poll porn!

Literally hating the troops and getting caught on tape admitting you lied about how serious coronavirus was doesn't seem to be the greatest campaign strategy Donald Trump ever came up with, though we're sure he'll figure out something worse in the next 48 days.

We have a veritable fucking SLEW of polls to show you, and none of them are good for Trump, which means they have that in common with every other poll taken of this election season.

The latest is that Democrat Sara Gideon is up 12 POINTS over professional concerned face Senator Susan Collins in Maine, per Quinnipiac. ( Donate her! ) Meanwhile, Democrat Jaime Harrison is TIED with Senator Lindsey Graham in South Carolina. Could it be an outlier? Maybe. Or it could be a fuckin' RACE. ( Donate him! )

#NEW @QuinnipiacPoll #SCSen: Jaime Harrison (D) 48% Lindsey Graham (R-Inc) 48% #MESen: Sara Gideon (D) 54% (+12)… https://t.co/r6bJpYgk0Y

— Political Polls (@Political Polls) 1600280178.0 

More Senate? Here's one. Mark Kelly up 12 points over verified asshole Martha McSally. ( Donate him! )

Oh look, Rebecca wants to insert one of her own tweets in a story, for a change!

While we're all sending money to @harrisonjaime, Kansas hasn't been polled in a month, when Dem @BarbaraBollier was… https: //t.co/rGVtJSV4kA

— Rebecca Schoenkopf, Wonkette Editrix, King Of You (@Rebecca Schoenkopf, Wonkette Editrix, King Of You) 1600283355.0 

MONEY ... you get it.

A new Reuters poll has Joe Biden up nine points nationwide, which tracks with another new poll from The Economist/YouGov. Meanwhile, Rasmussen seems, as usual, to be huffing asbestos with the shadows on Michael Caputo's ceiling, as it has Trump up by one point. Oh, Rasmussen, you are adorable, how you only poll people waiting in line at the Cracker Barrel right before they go to the Purity Ball with their jorts-wearing dads, ALLEGEDLY.

On a state level, the new ABC/Washington Post poll says Biden is up six points in Wisconsin, and 16 WE SAID 16 points in Minnesota. Meanwhile Politico/Morning Consult's daily tracker has Biden up in Wisconsin by NINE.

Oh, and did we mention Monmouth, one of the finest polling shops in town, and its new data on Florida?

FLORIDA VOTER POLL: #GeneralElection matchup All registered voter: 50% @JoeBiden 45% @realDonaldTrump Likely vot… https://t.co/TOhi2YIbOI

— MonmouthPoll (@MonmouthPoll) 1600189264.0 

On top of that, nine out of 10 Americans, according to another poll, say Kanye West shouldn't tweet videos of himself doing pee tapes, while the remaining one out of 10 Americans is into that sort of thing. (We made up that poll.)

On that note, Eric Boehlert has a really good piece today about how all these kindsa numbers stand in extremely sharp contrast to what the media is reporting about what the polls say, because, as ever, they are just DYING for a horserace.

"MINNESOTA: Some See an Edge for Trump," read one headline. The [New York] Times interviewed just two people for the article and both thought Biden was facing trouble in Minnesota. Trump "looks stronger politically in the state than he did in 2016," and Biden was "hardly a lock to carry the state," the Times reported, even though the daily just found Biden's lead to be nine points, seven weeks from Election Day.

Looking at Michigan, the Times marveled at how the crowds for Trump were so much larger than Biden's, even though Biden has led in 29 of the last 30 Michigan polls taken this year. And in Florida, the Times stressed that Biden "has been slipping among Hispanic voters," but made no mention of Biden's historic advantage with seniors.

This year's not-so-dirty secret: The campaign press desperately wants to tell an exciting election season story.

And there isn't one . At least not with polls.

The exciting election season story is the Trump campaign and administration with their desperate attempts to fuck up access to the ballot box for the consistently huge majorities of Americans who want to vote for Biden and down-ballot Democrats. The story is that Russia is attacking the election   right now to help Trump, while the Trump administration is flat-out lying and saying the REAL election meddlers this time are 'GIIIIIIIIINA, for BIIIIIIIIIDEN. The story is that GOP Senator Ron Johnson is literally acting as a willing conduit for a Russian election attack on Joe Biden.

Those are the stories.

The Times is far from the only outlet Boehlert goes after. Politico is pulling this shit and NBC News is pulling this shit and CBS News is pulling this shit. And many more!

About a month ago, Wonkette published a piece called This Shit Is Not In The Bag, which argued, as you might gather, that this shit is not in the bag. And it's not! We have to donate and volunteer and sign up as poll workers and PLAN OUR FUCKING VOTES and help others plan their votes, and so many other things. And we have to be ready for whatever election fuckery these goddamned fascists and their Russian puppetmasters throw at us. But honestly the polls haven't changed since we wrote that piece. Hell, they really haven't changed much this entire election season .

The story remains the same: if the people vote, the people win, and Joe Biden wins, and Kamala Harris wins, and Sara Gideon wins, and Mark Kelly wins, and we take back the fucking Senate, and Kanye stops literally peeing all over the internet.

So remain as always cautiously optimistic and continue doing the work. It's not over yet. But it's getting closer.

Forty-eight days, y'all.

OPEN THREAD.

[ PressRun ]

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