This young lady is Adrionna Harris, a sixth-grader at Bayside Middle school in Virginia Beach, Virginia. And she is a pretty decent kid who did a pretty cool thing: last week, when she saw a classmate cutting himself with a snap-off blade segment from a utility knife, she took the blade away from the boy, threw it away, and reported the incident to school administrators the next day. And then she got a gift certificate for a pizza party and a commendation for excellent citizenship, right? Precisely, just as long as you replace "gift certificate for a pizza party" with "10-day suspension" and "commendation for excellent citizenship" with "recommendation for expulsion for violating the school's zero-tolerance of weapons policy." We would make a joke about how you can totally tell that she's a blade-wielding thug just by looking at that rebellious dyed hair, but no, she is obviously a sweetheart who was raised right, with just the small oversight on her parents' part that they didn't get around to explaining just how idiotic institutions can be. And now she's learned that.
This episode already flags the student as a rabble-rouser. The administrator what recommended expulsion is either adequately shamed by the media coverage or has put Adrionna on the permanent shit list.
I say send the pizza to the school, Jeff Spicoli style.
Rebecca's on it!
*guy: white male
Win forever.
Yes, Virginia, you are a fucking idiot.
And don't call me Shirley!
or cutting class ...
This episode already flags the student as a rabble-rouser. The administrator what recommended expulsion is either adequately shamed by the media coverage or has put Adrionna on the permanent shit list.
I say send the pizza to the school, Jeff Spicoli style.
Saving a classmate from irreperable harm? <i>Just say no.</i>
See? A snappy tagline is always so much easier to remember than a common sense solution.
Careful: no pizza slicers allowed.
How about a pardon, Gov. McAuliffe, you big mouth showboat?
Apply directly to the forehead!!
Administrators gave him another blade.
Come on, it&#039;s no less ridiculose than the rest of the story.
The only thing that stops a troubled kid with a razor blade is ... well, nothing. It&#039;s against the rules.
SEE TOLD YOO NOBAMA&#039;S WILL DEATH PANELLING US!! -- Probably in the comments
If only comment moderators had an effective zero-tolerance policy towards weaponized derp.
Rule ONE: Never EVER go to the comments. There&#039;s a reason yr Wonkette doesn&#039;t allow comments, remember?